{"product_id":"what-i-had-before-i-had-you-a-novel-isbn-9780062237842","title":"What I Had Before I Had You: A Novel","description":"\u003cp\u003eIn \u003cem\u003eWhat I Had Before I Had You\u003c\/em\u003e by Sarah Cornwell, a woman must face the truth about her past in this luminous, evocative literary novel of parents and children, guilt and forgiveness, memory and magical thinking, set in the faded, gritty world of the New Jersey Shore.\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003eOlivia was only fifteen the summer she left her hometown of Ocean Vista. Two decades later, on a visit with her children, her nine-year-old son Daniel, recently diagnosed with bipolar disorder, disappears. Olivia’s search for him sparks tender and painful memories of her past—of her fiercely loving and secretive mother, Myla, an erratic and beautiful psychic, and the discovery of heartbreaking secrets that shattered her world.\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e | \u003cp\u003eWritten in radiant prose and with stunning psychological acuity, award-winning author Sarah Cornwell's \u003cem\u003eWhat I Had Before I Had You\u003c\/em\u003e is a deeply poignant story that captures the joys and sorrows of growing up and learning to let go.\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003eOlivia Reed was fifteen when she left her hometown of Ocean Vista on the Jersey Shore. Two decades later, divorced and unstrung, she returns with her teenage daughter, Carrie, and nine-year-old son, Daniel, recently diagnosed with bipolar disorder. Distracted by thoughts of the past, Olivia fails to notice when Daniel disappears from her side. Her frantic search for him sparks memories of the summer of 1987, when she exploded out of the cocoon of her mother's fierce, smothering love and into a sudden, full-throttle adolescence, complete with dangerous new friends, first love, and a rebellion so intense that it utterly recharted the course of her life.\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003eOlivia's mother, Myla, was a practicing psychic whose powers waxed and waned along with her mercurial moods. Myla raised Olivia to be a guarded child, and also to believe in the ever-present infant ghosts of her twin sisters, whom Myla took care of as if they were alive—diapers, baby food, an empty nursery kept like a shrine. At fifteen, Olivia saw her sisters for the first time, not as ghostly infants but as teenagers on the beach. But when Myla denied her vision, Olivia set out to learn the truth—a journey that led to shattering discoveries about herself and her family.\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003eSarah Cornwell seamlessly weaves together the past and the present in this riveting debut novel, as she examines the relationships between mothers and daughters, and the powerful forces of loss, family history, and magical thinking.\u003c\/p\u003e | \u003cp\u003e“Cornwell’s debut novel is equal parts page-turner and dreamy meditation on the nature of mental illness. Set in the continuous present tense, its characters challenge the reader to establish what is ‘real’ about real life, and what is ‘imaginary’ about the oh-so-important imaginary life. An important exploration of the deepest philosophical inquiries into the nature of existence, family, and love. I highly recommend.” - \u003cb\u003e\u003ci\u003eAntonya Nelson, author of Bound\u003c\/i\u003e\u003c\/b\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003e“Cornwell’s debut novel is equal parts page-turner and dreamy meditation on the nature of mental illness. . . . An important exploration of the deepest philosophical inquiries into the nature of existence, family, and love. I highly recommend.” - \u003cb\u003e\u003ci\u003eAntonya Nelson, author of Bound\u003c\/i\u003e\u003c\/b\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003e“Sarah Cornwell has a brilliant eye for the telling detail, and a wonderfully original way of embodying family history. I was captivated by her memorable characters and the perfectly paced revelations of their surprising relationships.” - \u003cb\u003e\u003ci\u003eAndrea Barrett, author of Archangel and The Voyage of the Narwhal\u003c\/i\u003e\u003c\/b\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003e“Only a few writers can genuinely capture that stormy period between childhood and adulthood and Sarah Cornwell is one of them. . . . The result is an exhilarting, hurtling, unstoppable ride for the reader.” - \u003cb\u003e\u003ci\u003eMargot Livesey, author of The Flight of Gemma Hardy\u003c\/i\u003e\u003c\/b\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003e“Captivating. . . . Depth of insight, dreamy prose, and an engrossing storyline mark this wonderful debut.” - \u003cb\u003e\u003ci\u003ePublishers Weekly (starred review)\u003c\/i\u003e\u003c\/b\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003e“Cornwell skillfully navigates themes of mental illness, memories, and identity with carefully chosen prose. . . . [An] impressive first novel.” - \u003cb\u003e\u003ci\u003eThe Austin Review\u003c\/i\u003e\u003c\/b\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003e“This debut novel blew me away with the beauty of its language and the honesty of its narrator. . . . The reality of living with a parent with mental illness, and how it impacts a child, is heartbreakingly beautiful in Cornwell’s capable hands.” - \u003cb\u003e\u003ci\u003eJodi Picoult Lists Her Favorite Reads of 2014, Amazon\u003c\/i\u003e\u003c\/b\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003e“Twining Olivia’s teenage past with her grown-up present, Cornwell tells a sensitive, clear-eyed, and ever so slightly supernatural story of a family shaped by mental illness.” - \u003cb\u003e\u003ci\u003eBoston Globe\u003c\/i\u003e\u003c\/b\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003e“This is a remarkable debut by an award-winning short story writer; Cornwell’s psychological study of the stormy relationships in one particular family is engrossing and insightful.” - \u003cb\u003e\u003ci\u003eLibrary Journal\u003c\/i\u003e\u003c\/b\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003e“[A] bewitching first novel. . . . In chapters alternating between the puzzling, pressurized present and eerily predictive past, Cornwell weaves the novel’s double narrative with the deft touch of a magician and the sure hand of a confident writer to watch.” - \u003cb\u003e\u003ci\u003eElle\u003c\/i\u003e\u003c\/b\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003e“You’re reading, you’re enthralled by the story and the characters and the Jersey Shore in the summer, and sprinkled throughout are these wonderful sentences that make you stop, simple yet resonant like the clear ping of crystal stemware.” - \u003cb\u003e\u003ci\u003eThe Rumpus\u003c\/i\u003e\u003c\/b\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003e“The subtler workings of past trauma on present-day lives underscore Sarah Cornwell’s psychological page-turner.” - \u003cb\u003e\u003ci\u003eVogue.com\u003c\/i\u003e\u003c\/b\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003e“Cornwell skillfully navigates themes of mental illness, memories, and identity with carefully chosen prose. . . . The backbone of this impressive first novel is the masterful way she uses language to not only craft a tangible setting, but to explore the significance of that setting on her characters and their relationships.” - \u003cb\u003e\u003ci\u003eThe Austin Review\u003c\/i\u003e\u003c\/b\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003e“[Cornwell] handles the delicate subject of mental illness and the realities of living with a mood disorder with compassion and grace. . . . [A] thoughtful and powerful debut.” - \u003cb\u003e\u003ci\u003eBookPage\u003c\/i\u003e\u003c\/b\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003e“Cornwell’s debut is a dreamy trip to the past with one foot planted in the present. Readers will enjoy trying to figure out the puzzle of Olivia’s past, while desperately hoping she finds her missing son. This haunting tale of a childhood distorted by trauma, myth and devotion will stay with readers long after they’ve turned the last page.” - \u003cb\u003e\u003ci\u003eRomantic Times\u003c\/i\u003e\u003c\/b\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003e“Cornwell’s debut is a dreamy trip to the past with one foot planted in the present. . . . This haunting tale of a childhood distorted by trauma, myth and devotion will stay with readers long after they’ve turned the last page.” - \u003cb\u003e\u003ci\u003eRomantic Times\u003c\/i\u003e\u003c\/b\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003e“An engaging debut. . . . Well-paced, with enough tension to be absorbing, \u003ci\u003eWhat I Had Before I Had You\u003c\/i\u003e is replete with lyrical turns of phrase and spot-on details.” - \u003cb\u003e\u003ci\u003eNew Jersey Monthly\u003c\/i\u003e\u003c\/b\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003e“If reading literary fiction truly increases one’s emotional intelligence (as a recent study suggests), this lively debut novel by Sarah Cornwell has much to contribute. . . . The novel involves deft plot twists and last-minute revelations that add to the suspense.” - \u003cb\u003e\u003ci\u003eDallas Morning News\u003c\/i\u003e\u003c\/b\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003e“Sarah Cornwell’s debut novel meshes past and present, mothers and children, and magic and memory to give readers the kind of book they can be glad exists.” - \u003cb\u003e\u003ci\u003eDaily Candy\u003c\/i\u003e\u003c\/b\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003e“An incandescent debut by turns thrilling and meditative; part coming of age novel, part exploration of the fragility and complexity of love and family. Sarah Cornwell is a writer to be celebrated and watched.” - \u003cb\u003e\u003ci\u003ePhilipp Meyer, author of The Son\u003c\/i\u003e\u003c\/b\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003e“Cornwell’s first novel is an authentic and artful coming-of-age story that is uniquely multigenerational. In lyrical language, she renders a turbulent adolescence that is achingly believable and a heartfelt tribute to the struggles of mental illness. Readers are kept on their toes as Olivia’s story, by turns endearing and suspenseful, unfolds and the search for Daniel drags on. With great attention to detail and a smooth flow between past and present, this emotionally charged narrative is as memorable as it is compelling.” - \u003cb\u003e\u003ci\u003eBooklist (starred review)\u003c\/i\u003e\u003c\/b\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003e“Cornwell’s first novel is an authentic and artful coming-of-age story that is uniquely multigenerational. . . . With great attention to detail and a smooth flow between past and present, this emotionally charged narrative is as memorable as it is compelling.” - \u003cb\u003e\u003ci\u003eBooklist (starred review)\u003c\/i\u003e\u003c\/b\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003e“Gorgeously crafted, Cornwell’s tale shimmers and shimmies with nimble dialogue and poignantly flawed characters. . . . Grafting magical thinking onto gimlet-eyed acceptance, Cornwell’s debut novel enchants.” - \u003cb\u003e\u003ci\u003eKirkus Reviews\u003c\/i\u003e\u003c\/b\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003e“Sarah Cornwell’s first novel is as unnerving and authoritative as Hilary Mantel’s \u003ci\u003eBeyond Black\u003c\/i\u003e. This is a beautifully written book, bold and wounding. Read it and you will never look at the Jersey Shore in quite the same way again.” - \u003cb\u003e\u003ci\u003eJames Magnuson, author of Famous Writers I Have Known\u003c\/i\u003e\u003c\/b\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003e“[Cornwell] handles the delicate subject of mental illness and the realities of living with a mood disorder with compassion and grace, providing a new lens through which to explore questions regarding the burden of inheritance, parent-child dynamics and what it truly means to come of age. Cornwell has previously garnered awards for her screenwriting and short fiction, but if this thoughtful and powerful debut is anything to go by, it won’t be long before she starts racking them up for her novels as well.” - \u003cb\u003e\u003ci\u003eBookPage\u003c\/i\u003e\u003c\/b\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e","brand":"Harper","offers":[{"title":"Default Title","offer_id":44888154931429,"sku":"NP9780062237842","price":24.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":false}],"thumbnail_url":"\/\/cdn.shopify.com\/s\/files\/1\/1842\/7735\/files\/9780062237842.jpg?v=1730228280","url":"https:\/\/k12savings.com\/products\/what-i-had-before-i-had-you-a-novel-isbn-9780062237842","provider":"K12savings","version":"1.0","type":"link"}