{"product_id":"walkman-isbn-9780143134909","title":"Walkman","description":"\u003cb\u003eA new collection from an audacious, humorous poet celebrated for his \"sky-blue originality of utterance\" (Dwight Garner, \u003ci\u003eThe New York Times\u003c\/i\u003e)\u003c\/b\u003e\u003cbr\u003e\u003cbr\u003eMichael Robbins's first two books of poetry were raucous protests lodged from the frontage roads and big-box stores of off-ramp America. With \u003ci\u003eWalkman\u003c\/i\u003e, he turns a corner. These new poems confront self-pity and nostalgia in witty-miserable defiance of our political and ecological moment. It's the end of the world, and Robbins has listened to all the tapes in his backpack. So he's making music from whatever junk he finds lying around.\u003cb\u003e\u003cu\u003ePraise for \u003ci\u003eWalkman\u003c\/i\u003e:\u003c\/u\u003e\u003c\/b\u003e\u003cbr\u003e\u003cbr\u003e“\u003ci\u003eWalkman\u003c\/i\u003e works in the blunt, epic, bouillon ways of the pop song, unapologetically understandable and generally brief . . . demonstrative and good-natured . . . For Robbins, salvation is found more often in music than in any other vernacular construction with access to the transcendent\u003ci\u003e.\u003c\/i\u003e” \u003cb\u003e\u003ci\u003e—\u003c\/i\u003eSasha Frere-Jones, \u003ci\u003ePoetry Foundation\u003c\/i\u003e\u003c\/b\u003e\u003cbr\u003e\u003cbr\u003e“\u003ci\u003eWalkman\u003c\/i\u003e displays a depth born out of experience . . . Robbins’s quicksilver wit hasn’t abandoned him . . . \u003ci\u003eWalkman\u003c\/i\u003e does have radically new notes, though. The tone is, like [James] Schuyler, more tender. Language still riots, but these poems offer the record of a lonesome, sad, at times hopeful soul.” \u003cb\u003e—\u003ci\u003eCommonweal\u003cbr\u003e\u003c\/i\u003e\u003c\/b\u003e\u003cbr\u003e“Robbins has perfected the art of Marxist miserabilism in verse, allowing himself a measure of self-pity and nostalgia (and even some unorthodox faith) in the face of political and ecological catastrophe. Still militantly funny, still the realest.” \u003cb\u003e—\u003ci\u003eDrawn \u0026amp; Quarterly\u003c\/i\u003e\u003c\/b\u003e\u003cbr\u003e\u003cbr\u003e“In \u003ci\u003eWalkman\u003c\/i\u003e, poetry and pop music do the job of sustaining some kind of attachment to life within an existence that often feels unsustainable.” \u003cb\u003e—\u003ci\u003eLos Angeles Review of Books\u003c\/i\u003e\u003c\/b\u003e\u003cbr\u003e\u003cbr\u003e“If you are a fellow devotee of the old Robbins, take heart: the new style only clarifies why the first books were so good. And if you have never read the guy before, start with this book—with this book, I insist, and not the first two books, because the new tone is as right for our time as the old one was for its time. A decade into the apocalypse, Robbins, God help him, has not yet averted his eyes.” \u003cb\u003e—\u003ci\u003eCleveland Review of Books\u003c\/i\u003e\u003c\/b\u003e\u003cbr\u003e\u003cbr\u003e“If all you knew of Michael Robbins was his poem 'Walkman' [...] you’d know he was the author of a stupendously beautiful poem that’s worth buying a whole book for . . . funny, tender, vulnerable, sad . . . Ultimately, poetic attention to our losses will not save us, and there is plenty of despair, bitterness, and disgust to go around in these poems. And yet \u003ci\u003eWalkman\u003c\/i\u003e shows us, too, that loss can be mysterious, and can occasionally make the world seem less threadbare and disenchanted.” \u003cb\u003e—\u003ci\u003eHarvard Review\u003c\/i\u003e\u003c\/b\u003e \u003cbr\u003e\u003cbr\u003e“Passages of lyrical coherence are built on a newly permeable, experiencing voice, capable both of ranging around and cutting through. They are still in competition with the desire not to seem a schmuck, but at their best these poems can say, as in “Equipment for Living,” 'the world is broken, but this is one of the things we do about it.'” \u003cb\u003e—\u003ci\u003eThe Baffler\u003c\/i\u003e\u003c\/b\u003e\u003cbr\u003e\u003cbr\u003e“Robbins’ ironic distance [is] a roundabout way of disarming the reader and allowing an incredibly potent voice to shine through. This voice carries the collection.... \u003ci\u003eWalkman\u003c\/i\u003e is a collection that’s ready to address the events of the past year without feeling rooted in that time or place. You’ll be able to come back to the collection in a decade, partly because the poems happen on a personal scale and won’t age as poorly as directly political poems, but also because Robbins’ oblique angle on our compounding crisis is both less urgent and more poignant.” \u003cb\u003e—\u003ci\u003eAmerican Microreviews\u003c\/i\u003e\u003c\/b\u003e\u003cbr\u003e\u003cbr\u003e“[\u003ci\u003eWalkman\u003c\/i\u003e] isn't as nostalgic as its title might suggest. It's less noisy, a bit slower-paced, than [Robbins's] earlier work. Several of the longer poems sit somewhere between Wordsworth and Frank O'Hara, and they manage to be inward even when their gaze turns outward. Robbins knows about the trickiness of words, too: 'I'm \/ sorry language is a ship \/ that goes down \/ while you're building it.' Poetry like this helps keep us afloat.” \u003cb\u003e—Bill Manhire, \u003ci\u003eNew Zealand Herald\u003c\/i\u003e\u003c\/b\u003e \u003cbr\u003e\u003cbr\u003e\"Much of [\u003ci\u003eWalkman\u003c\/i\u003e] really is very funny, in a dour way. But it is also a gentler, more wounded book than I anticipated, and at times it gives wonderfully homely (in a good sense) voice to a sense of impending doom and a longing for a safe and quiet shelter from the storm. And yet, in the end, there’s a hopefulness in these poems too—or at least a faith in the possibility of hope, and in fact of love. At times, I felt as if what I was reading was as much private prayer as public performance. It is a genuinely moving collection.\"\u003cb\u003e —David Bentley Hart, author of \u003ci\u003eThat All Shall Be Saved\u003c\/i\u003e and \u003ci\u003eThe Experience of God\u003c\/i\u003e\u003cbr\u003e\u003c\/b\u003e\u003cbr\u003e“The title poem sets a wistful, reflective, almost spiritual tone in a collection that addresses such serious subjects as heaven, hell, and faith with humor and self-deprecation . . . Robbins is a master satirist, whether he's pontificating on the environment, the behavior of today’s youth, or his allergies, and he does it with a nod to taking things less seriously even as the apocalypse approaches.” \u003cb\u003e—\u003ci\u003eBooklist\u003c\/i\u003e\u003c\/b\u003e\u003cb\u003eMichael Robbins\u003c\/b\u003e now lives in New Jersey. He is the author of \u003ci\u003eWalkman\u003c\/i\u003e and two previous poetry collections, \u003ci\u003eAlien vs. Predator\u003c\/i\u003e and \u003ci\u003eThe Second Sex\u003c\/i\u003e, and \u003ci\u003eEquipment for Living: On Poetry and Pop Music\u003c\/i\u003e, a volume of essays, as well as the editor of \u003ci\u003eMargaret Cavendish\u003c\/i\u003e, a selection of the duchess’s poems. He is an associate professor of English at Montclair State University.\u003cbr\u003e \u003cp\u003eWalkman\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003e \u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003eI didn't mean to quit drinking,\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003e \u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003eit just sort of happened.\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003e \u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003eI'd always assumed\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003e \u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003eit'd be difficult, or not\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003e \u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003edifficult, exactly,\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003e \u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003ebut impossible.\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003e \u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003eThen one New Year's Eve\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003e \u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003etwenty years ago\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003e \u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003eat the VFW, Craig and I\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003e \u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003ewere drinking beer\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003e \u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003efrom brown bottles,\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003e \u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003epeeling the labels off\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003e \u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003einto little confetti nests.\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003e \u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003eIn Mexico\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003e \u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003ethe previous New Year's Eve,\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003e \u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003eI'd started drinking\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003e \u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003eagain after a year sober.\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003e \u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003eI traveled by myself\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003e \u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003ein Oaxaca for a month\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003e \u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003eand had at least two\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003e \u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003ebeautiful experiences.\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003e \u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003eThe bus I was on broke\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003e \u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003edown in the mountains\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003e \u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003eand I watched the stars blink\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003e \u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003eon with a Mexican girl\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003e \u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003ewho later sent me a letter\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003e \u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003eI never answered. That's one\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003e \u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003eof the experiences. The others\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003e \u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003eare secrets. We left the VFW\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003e \u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003eat a reasonable hour for once.\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003e \u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003eI never took another drink.\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003e \u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003eI'm not sure why not.\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003e \u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003eI don't think it had anything\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003e \u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003eto do with me. I think\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003e \u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003eit was a miracle. Like when\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003e \u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003ethe hero at the last\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003e \u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003esecond pulls the lever to switch\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003e \u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003ethe train to the track the heroine's\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003e \u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003enot tied to. I was always broke\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003e \u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003ein those days, whereas now I'm just\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003e \u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003epoor. I brought a Walkman\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003e \u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003eand a backpack stuffed with\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003e \u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003ecassettes to Oaxaca. I was sick\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003e \u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003eof them all within a week\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003e \u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003eand longed to buy a new tape\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003e \u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003ebut couldn't spare the pesos.\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003e \u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003eI listened to Live Through This\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003e \u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003eat the Zapotec ruins\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003e \u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003eof Monte Alb‡n,\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003e \u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003eRumours on the bus to DF.\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003e \u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003eAt Puerto çngel,\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003e \u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003emy headphones leaking\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003e \u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003etinny discord\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003e \u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003eacross a rooftop bar,\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003e \u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003eI sat watching the ocean.\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003e \u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003eAn American man about the age\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003e \u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003eI am now\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003e \u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003easked me what I was listening to.\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003e \u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003eI said Sonic Youth. He asked\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003e \u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003ewhich album, I said Sister.\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003e \u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003eHe chuckled and said\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003e \u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003e\"I'm Johnny Strike.\"\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003e \u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003eIt probably wasn't a miracle,\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003e \u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003ebut I couldn't believe it.\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003e \u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003eHere was the guy who wrote\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003e \u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003eCrime's 1976 classic\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003e \u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003e\"Hot Wire My Heart,\"\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003e \u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003ewhich Sonic Youth covered\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003e \u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003eon their 1987 classic, Sister,\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003e \u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003ewhich I was listening to\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003e \u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003eon my Walkman\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003e \u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003eat the end of Mexico in the sun.\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003e \u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003eExcept actually I was\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003e \u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003elistening to Daydream Nation,\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003e \u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003eI change it to Sister\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003e \u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003ewhen I tell that story.\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003e \u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003eBut it's a beautiful story\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003e \u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003eeven without embellishment.\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003e \u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003eThat's another of the Oaxacan\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003e \u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003eexperiences I mentioned,\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003e \u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003ebut the rest are secrets.\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003e \u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003eOh Mexico, as James Schuyler\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003e \u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003ewrote to Frank O'Hara,\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003e \u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003eare you just another\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003e \u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003edissembling dream?\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003e \u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003eSchuyler was too tender\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003e \u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003efor me then, but now\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003e \u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003ehe is just tender enough.\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003e \u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003eI love his wishes.\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003e \u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003eThat \"the beautiful humorous\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003e \u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003ewhite whippet\" could\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003e \u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003ebe immortal, for instance.\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003e \u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003eBut I can't always forgive\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003e \u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003ehis Central Park West tone,\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003e \u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003ehis Austrian operettas\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003e \u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003eand long long lawns,\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003e \u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003ethough he wasn't rich\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003e \u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003eand was tormented\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003e \u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003eenough, God knows.\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003e \u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003eIn the summer of 1984\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003e \u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003ein Salida, Colorado,\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003e \u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003eI had Slade and Steve Perry\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003e \u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003eon my Walkman.\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003e \u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003eI drank milk from jumbo\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003e \u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003eBurger King glasses\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003e \u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003eemblazoned with scenes\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003e \u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003efrom Return of the Jedi.\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003e \u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003eYou can't buy tampons\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003e \u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003ewith food stamps\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003e \u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003eeven if your mother\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003e \u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003einsists that you try.\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003e \u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003eSalida sits along\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003e \u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003ethe Arkansas River,\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003e \u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003ewhose current\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003e \u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003eone hot afternoon\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003e \u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003eswept me away\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003e \u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003eand deposited me\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003e \u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003ein a shallow far downstream.\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003e \u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003eIt was the first time\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003e \u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003eI thought I was going\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003e \u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003eto die and didn't. The Arkansas\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003e \u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003eand everything else are mortal.\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003e \u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003eMy mom had been born again,\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003e \u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003eto my chagrin. But lately I find\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003e \u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003eI do believe in God\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003e \u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003ethe Father Almighty, Maker\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003e \u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003eof heaven and earth:\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003e \u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003eand in Jesus Christ,\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003e \u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003ehis Son our Lord,\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003e \u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003ewho was conceived by\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003e \u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003ethe Holy Ghost. How\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003e \u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003ethe hell did I become\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003e \u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003ea Christian? Grace,\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003e \u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003eI guess. It just sort of\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003e \u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003ehappened. I admit I find\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003e \u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003ethe resurrection of the body\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003e \u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003eand life everlasting\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003e \u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003edifficult, or not difficult,\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003e \u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003eexactly, but impossible.\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003e \u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003eThere is no crazier belief\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003e \u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003ethan that we won't be\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003e \u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003ecovered by leaves, leaves,\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003e \u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003eleaves, as Schuyler has it,\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003e \u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003ewhich is to say, really gone,\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003e \u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003eas O'Hara put it in his lovely\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003e \u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003esad poem to John Ashbery.\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003e \u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003eBut hope is a different animal\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003e \u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003efrom belief. \"The crazy hope\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003e \u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003ethat Paul proclaims in 2\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003e \u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003eCorinthians,\" my friend John\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003e \u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003ewrote to me when his mother\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003e \u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003edied. The Christian religion\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003e \u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003eis very beautiful sometimes\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003e \u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003eand very true at other times,\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003e \u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003ethough sophisticated persons\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003e \u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003eare still expected to be above\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003e \u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003eall that sort of thing. Well,\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003e \u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003eI'm a Marxist\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003e \u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003etoo. Go and sell that thou\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003e \u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003ehast, and give to the poor.\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003e \u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003eOn his new album Dr. Dre\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003e \u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003esays \"Anybody complaining\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003e \u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003eabout their circumstances\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003e \u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003elost me.\" At the risk of losing\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003e \u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003emore billionaires, complain\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003e \u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003eabout your circumstances,\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003e \u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003eI say. I listened to The Chronic\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003e \u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003eon my Walkman the summer\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003e \u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003eI worked the night shift\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003e \u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003eat Kinko's. I was dating Deirdre,\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003e \u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003ewho when I placed my headphones\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003e \u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003eon her ears and pushed play\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003e \u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003esaid \"Why is this man cursing\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003e \u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003eat me?\" Said it more loudly\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003e \u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003ethan was strictly necessary.\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003e \u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003eA crazy man\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003e \u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003ewould come into Kinko's\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003e \u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003earound two a.m. and ask me\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003e \u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003eto fax dire, scribbled warnings\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003e \u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003eto every news outlet in Denver.\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003e \u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003eHe wanted to let people know\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003e \u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003ethat God would punish the area\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003e \u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003ewith natural disasters\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003e \u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003eif the county succeeded\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003e \u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003ein evicting him from the land\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003e \u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003ehe was squatting on. He'd ask me\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003e \u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003eto help him think of various\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003e \u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003eextreme weather events\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003e \u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003ethat God might unleash.\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003e \u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003eI'd say \"Typhoons?\"\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003e \u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003ethough we were in Colorado.\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003e \u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003eHe'd scribble typhoons.\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003e \u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003eScraps of dirty paper absolutely\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003e \u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003ecovered front and back with ominous,\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003e \u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003eangrily scrawled black characters:\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003e \u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003eattn. nbc nightly news there will\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003e \u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003ebe fires tornadoes typhoons.\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003e \u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003eI would help him compose his screeds\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003e \u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003ethen fax each one to Denver's\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003e \u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003emajor TV and radio stations, the Denver Post,\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003e \u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003eand the Rocky Mountain News,\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003e \u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003ewhich has since stopped its presses\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003e \u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003efor good. Except in fact I would\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003e \u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003eonly pretend to fax them\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003e \u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003eand then refuse his money,\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003e \u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003esaying I was glad to help the cause.\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003e \u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003eWhat if he wasn't batshit but a true\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003e \u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003eprophet? The Denver metropolitan area\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003e \u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003ewas not visited by disaster\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003e \u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003eat that time, but this proves\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003e \u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003enothing. Look at Jonah and\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003e \u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003eNineveh, that great city.\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003e \u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003eI don't believe he was a prophet,\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003e \u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003ebut Kinko's is beautiful\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003e \u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003eat two a.m. even if I hated\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003e \u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003eworking there. The rows\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003e \u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003eof silent copiers\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003e \u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003elike retired dreadnoughts\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003e \u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003ein a back bay, the fluorescent\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003e \u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003epallor, the classic-rock station\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003e \u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003eI would turn back up after\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003e \u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003emy coworker turned it down.\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003e \u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003eDid the guy sketch amateurish\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003e \u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003efloods, tornadoes, etc.,\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003e \u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003eon his jeremiads or did I\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003e \u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003eimagine that? I wish\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003e \u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003eI'd thought to make copies\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003e \u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003efor myself. I wish I'd kept\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003e \u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003ethe Mexican girl's letter.\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003e \u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003eI wish I'd kept the copiers\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003e \u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003ewith their slow arms\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003e \u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003eof light, the lights of DF\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003e \u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003efilling the Valley of Mexico\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003e \u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003eas the bus makes its slow way\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003e \u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003edown and Stevie sings what you\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003e \u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003ehad, oh, what you lost. Schuyler\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003e \u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003eand his wishes! \"I wish it was\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003e \u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003e1938 or '39 again.\" \"I wish\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003e \u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003eI could take an engine apart\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003e \u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003eand reassemble it.\" \"I wish I'd\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003e \u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003ebrought my book of enlightening\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003e \u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003eliterary essays.\" \"I wish I could press\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003e \u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003esnowflakes in a book like flowers.\"\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003e \u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003eThat last one's my favorite. I wish\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003e \u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003eI'd written it. I would often kick\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003e \u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003efor months until driven back to a bar\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003e \u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003eby fear or boredom or both. I saw\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003e \u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003eTomorrow Never Dies-starring\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003e \u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003ePierce Brosnan, the second-worst\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003e \u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003eJames Bond-in Oaxaca and\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003e \u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003ecame out wishing my life were\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003e \u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003eromantic and exciting and charmed\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003e \u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003eor at least that I had someone\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003e \u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003eto talk to. So I stopped at the first\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003e \u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003ebar I saw, and someone\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003e \u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003etalked to me. It's so sad and\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003e \u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003eperfect to be young and alone\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003e \u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003ein the Z—calo when the little lights\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003e \u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003ecome up like fish surfacing\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003e \u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003ebeneath the moon and you want\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003e \u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003eto grab the people walking by\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003e \u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003eand say who are you, are you\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003e \u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003eas afraid as I am. And you don't\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003e \u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003eknow that twenty years later\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003e \u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003eyou'll be writing this poem.\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003e \u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003eWell, now I'm being sentimental\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003e \u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003eand forgetting that in those days\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003e \u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003eI wrote the worst poems ever.\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003e \u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003e\"I held a guitar and trembled\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003e \u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003eand would not sing\" is an actual\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003e \u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003eline I wrote! The typhoon guy\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003e \u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003ecould have written better poetry.\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003e \u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003eToday I want to write about\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003e \u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003ehow it's been almost twenty years\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003e \u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003esince I owned a Walkman.\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003e \u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003eJust think: there was a song\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003e \u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003ethat I didn't know\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003e \u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003ewould be the last song\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003e \u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003eI would ever play on a Walkman.\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003e \u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003eI listened to it like it was just\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003e \u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003eany old song,\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003e \u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003ebecause it was.\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003e \u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003eThe Deep Heart's Core\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003e \u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003eWe must stop feeling things\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003e \u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003ein the deep heart's core.\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003e \u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003eThat's where the lies live.\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003e \u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003eIf you would see what's behind you,\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003e \u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003eclose your eyes. Shut your mouth\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003e \u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003eif you want to send people to hell.\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003e \u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003eYou have to want to go to hell. Deserve's\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003e \u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003egot nothing to do with it.\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003e \u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003eYet hell has a waiting list.\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003e \u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003eWell, that's how dumb I am,\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003e \u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003efeeling my way to hell one\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003e \u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003ename at a time.\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003e \u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003eYou Haven't Texted Since Saturday\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003e \u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003eYou haven't texted\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003e \u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003esince Saturday,\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003e \u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003ewhen I read Keith Waldrop's\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003e \u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003etranslation of Les Fleurs du Mal\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003e \u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003eon a bench by whatever\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003e \u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003ethat tower is on the hill\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003e \u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003ein Fort Greene Park\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003e \u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003euntil you walked up\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003e \u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003elate as always and I do\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003e \u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003emean always\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003e \u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003ein your dad's army jacket\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003e \u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003eand said \"Hi, buddy\"\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003e \u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003ein a tone that told me\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003e \u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003eall I needed to know,\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003e \u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003ealthough protocol dictated\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003e \u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003ethat you should sit next to me\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003e \u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003eand spell it out\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003e \u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003eand we should hold each other\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003e \u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003eand cry and then pretend\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003e \u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003eeverything was fine, would\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003e \u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003ebe fine, was someday\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003e \u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003ebefore the final\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003e \u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003etrumpet, before heat death,\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003e \u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003ezero point, big rip\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003e \u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003esure to be absolutely\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003e \u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003eperfectly completely\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003e \u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003eprobably fine. And\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003e \u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003ethough it wasn't and\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003e \u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003ewouldn't be,\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003e \u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003eI walked you to the G\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003e \u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003ethen rode the C\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003e \u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003eto Jay Street-MetroTech.\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003e \u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003eJust now I took a break from\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003e \u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003ethis retrospect\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003e \u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003eto smoke one of the Camels\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003e \u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003ein the sky-blue box marked\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003e \u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003eil fumo uccide\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003e \u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003eyou brought me from Italy\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003e \u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003eand page through a book\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003e \u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003eon contemporary physics.\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003e \u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003e\"Something must be\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003e \u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003every wrong,\" it said,\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003e \u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003eand I agreed,\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003e \u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003ealthough it turned out\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003e \u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003ethe author meant that \"no theory\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003e \u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003eof physics should produce\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003e \u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003einfinities with impunity.\"\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003e \u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003eI'd point out that every theory\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003e \u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003eof the heart\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003e \u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003eproduces infinities\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003e \u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003ewith impunity\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003e \u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003eif I were the kind of jerk\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003e \u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003ewho uses the heart\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003e \u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003eto mean the human\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003e \u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003etendency to make\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003e \u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003eothers suffer\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003e \u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003ejust because we\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003e \u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003ehate to suffer\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003e \u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003ealone. I'm sorry\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003e \u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003eI brought a fitted sheet\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003e \u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003eto the beach. I'm sorry\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003e \u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003eI'm selfish and determined\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003e \u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003eto make the worst\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003e \u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003eof everything. I'm\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003e \u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003esorry language is a ship\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003e \u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003ethat goes down\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003e \u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003ewhile you're building it.\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003e \u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003eThe Hesychasts of Byzantium\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003e \u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003estripped their prayers\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003e \u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003eof words. It's been tried\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003e \u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003ewith poems too. But insofar\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003e \u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003eas I am a disappointment\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003e \u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003eto myself and others, it seems fitting\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003e \u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003eto set up shop in almost\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003e \u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003eand not quite and that's not\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003e \u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003ewhat I meant. I draw the line at the heart,\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003e \u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003ethough, with its\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003e \u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003einfinities. And I have to say\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003e \u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003eI am not a big fan\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003e \u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003eof being sad. Some people\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003e \u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003ecan pull it off. When\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003e \u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003ewe hiked Overlook, you\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003e \u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003ewent on ahead to the summit\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003e \u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003ewhile I sat on a rock\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003e \u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003ereading Thomas Bernhard.\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003e \u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003eI'd just made it to the ruins\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003e \u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003eof the old hotel\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003e \u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003ewhen you came jogging back down\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003e \u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003ein your sports bra\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003e \u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003esaying I had to come see the view.\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003e \u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003eBut my allergies were bad\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003e \u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003eand I was thirsty,\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003e \u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003eso we headed down the gravelly trail,\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003e \u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003epleased by the occasional\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003e \u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003eadvent of a jittery\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003e \u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003echipmunk. You showed me pictures\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003e \u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003eon your phone of the fire\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003e \u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003etower, the nineteenth-\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003e \u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003ecentury graffiti carved\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003e \u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003einto the rock, and the long\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003e \u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003eunfolded valley\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003e \u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003eof the Hudson. At the bottom,\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003e \u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003ethe Buddhists let us\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003e \u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003efill our water bottles\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003e \u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003efrom their drinking fountain.\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003e \u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003eWe called a cab and sat\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003e \u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003ealong the roadside\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003e \u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003ewatching prayer flags\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003e \u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003erush in the wind. I said the wind\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003e \u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003ecarried the prayers\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003e \u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003einscribed on the flags\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003e \u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003eto the gods, but Wikipedia\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003e \u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003einforms me now that\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003e \u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003e       the Tibetans believe the prayers and mantras will be blown by the wind to spread\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003e       good will and compassion into all pervading space.\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003e \u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003eSo I was wrong, again,\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003e \u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003eabout the gods. Wherever\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003e \u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003eyou are, I hope you stand\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003e \u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003estill now and then\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003e \u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003eand let the prayers\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003e \u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003ewash over you like the breakers\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003e \u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003eat Fort Tilden that day\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003e \u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003ethe huge gray gothic\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003e \u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003eclouds massed and threatened to drop\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003e \u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003ea storm on our heads\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003e \u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003ebut didn't.\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003e \u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003eShed\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003e \u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003eI wish I had a shed out back\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003e \u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003eof a house in an open\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003e \u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003eplace and I'd sit in the cold\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003e \u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003eshed on quiet nights when all\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003e \u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003ethe televisions go out and\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003e \u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003ethe wires and the other wires\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003e \u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003esing, and wonder what the small\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003e \u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003ethings think about. A bitumen\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003e \u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003eboat in a royal tomb and a snake\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003e \u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003eand an angel too. Away from\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003e \u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003eloss prevention officers and\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003e \u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003e11 Secrets to Refinancing Your\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003e \u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003eStudent Loans. I don't mean\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003e \u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003esome romantic Unabomber\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003e \u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003eshit, just a shed. The light\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003e \u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003efrom a candle in the shed's\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003e \u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003esingle window tosses a golden\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003e \u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003esquare upon the snow that I\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003e \u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003enow see should surround\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003e \u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003eand shroud the shed. I hate\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003e \u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003ewinter, so these snows must\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003e \u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003ebe aesthetic. The December\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003e \u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003ebefore last I didn't leave my\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003e \u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003eapartment except for bodega\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003e \u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003eruns to stock up on Diet Coke\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003e \u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003eand peanut butter. I watched\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003e \u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003eevery Anthony Mann Western\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003e \u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003eand spent half a day trying to\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003e \u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003earrange Cheez-Its into the form\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003e \u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003eof Jimmy Stewart's face, then\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003e \u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003eate the face. Some sorrow is\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003e \u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003eso baroque you look back\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003e \u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003eon it and feel like a schmuck.\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003e \u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003eJust yesterday the CBD Lifestyle\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003e \u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003eStation clerk asked how I was\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003e \u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003eand I said \"Good, and you?\" like\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003e \u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003eyou're supposed to, like they teach\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003e \u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003eyou in disaster simulations. I\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003e \u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003eknow how to feel in my shed,\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003e \u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003eaway from these statues\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003e \u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003eof assholes on horses,\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003e \u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003eand I let the shed field\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003e \u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003ethe questions. Even in my\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003e \u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003eshed I want a shed.\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003e \u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003eWhen Didn't I Know It\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003e \u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003eI was born without language\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003e \u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003eand thus without the ability\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003e \u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003eto formulate a plan.\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003e \u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003eIt was a few years after\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003e \u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003ethe moon fell\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003e \u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003eto an American incursion.\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003e \u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003eI was smaller then\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003e \u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003eand prone to fits of pique.\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003e \u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003eI began to learn things\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003e \u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003eabout dinosaurs and the way\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003e \u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003ea bag of vending-machine chips\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003e \u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003ewill sometimes get stuck\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003e \u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003eon the Slinky-like contraption\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003e \u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003ethat pushes it into free fall.\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003e \u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003eAnd there is no remedy;\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003e \u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003eaccording to the system\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003e \u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003ea fair transaction was concluded.\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003e \u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003eI learned that airplanes hang\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003e \u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003eon wires from ceilings.\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003e \u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003eI feared wasps. I remained\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003e \u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003eoutside most churches.\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003e \u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003eI required stitches.\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003e \u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003eI was an expert on Bigfoot,\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003e \u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003ea reputed hominid\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003e \u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003ecalled s‡sq'ets\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003e \u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003eby the First Nations peoples.\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003e \u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003eI watched the moon\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003e \u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003eprecisely blot the sun\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003e \u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003eon the wall of a shoebox.\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003e \u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003eAs for Sea-Monkeys,\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003e \u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003ethey did not, in fact, ride\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003e \u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003eone another like cowboys\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003e \u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003eon ponies or follow\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003e \u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003ea candle beam as if hypnotized.\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003e \u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003eCobalt gives off-scientists\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003e \u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003esay \"emits\"-electrons. I\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003e \u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003eread that. I read about little\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003e \u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003ehouses, big horses, assistant\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003e \u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003epig-keepers, red ferns.\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003e \u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003eIn those days of products\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003e \u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003ewithout clocks, I called\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003e \u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003ea number to hear\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003e \u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003ethe time and temperature.\u003c\/p\u003e","brand":"Penguin Books","offers":[{"title":"Default Title","offer_id":46300494758117,"sku":"NP9780143134909","price":20.0,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":false}],"thumbnail_url":"\/\/cdn.shopify.com\/s\/files\/1\/1842\/7735\/files\/9780143134909.jpg?v=1767743569","url":"https:\/\/k12savings.com\/products\/walkman-isbn-9780143134909","provider":"K12savings","version":"1.0","type":"link"}