{"product_id":"the-leadership-gapisbn-9781101981351","title":"The Leadership Gap","description":"\u003cb\u003eDo people see you as the kind of leader you want to be? Are your strongest leadership qualities getting in the way of your greatness?\u003cbr\u003e\u003cbr\u003e\u003c\/b\u003eAfter decades of advising and inspiring some of the most eminent chief executives in the world, Lolly Daskal has uncovered a startling pattern: within each leader are powerful abilities that are also hidden impediments to greatness. She’s witnessed many highly driven, overachieving leaders rise to prominence fueled by well-honed skill sets, only to falter when the shadow sides of the same skills emerge.\u003cbr\u003e\u003cbr\u003eNow Daskal reveals her proven system, which leaders at any level can apply to dramatically improve their results. It begins with identifying your distinctive leadership archetype and recognizing its shadow:\u003cbr\u003e\u003cbr\u003e■ \u003cb\u003eThe Rebel\u003c\/b\u003e, driven by confidence, becomes \u003cb\u003ethe Imposter\u003c\/b\u003e, plagued by self-doubt.\u003cbr\u003e■\u003cb\u003e The Explorer\u003c\/b\u003e, fueled by intuition, becomes\u003cb\u003e the Exploiter\u003c\/b\u003e, master of manipulation.\u003cbr\u003e■ \u003cb\u003eThe Truth Teller\u003c\/b\u003e, who embraces candor, becomes \u003cb\u003ethe Deceiver\u003c\/b\u003e, who creates suspicion.\u003cbr\u003e■ \u003cb\u003eThe Hero\u003c\/b\u003e, embodying courage, becomes \u003cb\u003ethe Bystander\u003c\/b\u003e, an outright coward.\u003cbr\u003e■ \u003cb\u003eThe Inventor\u003c\/b\u003e, brimming with integrity, becomes \u003cb\u003ethe Destroyer\u003c\/b\u003e, who is morally corrupt.\u003cbr\u003e■ \u003cb\u003eThe Navigator\u003c\/b\u003e, trusts and is trusted, becomes\u003cb\u003e the Fixer\u003c\/b\u003e, endlessly arrogant.\u003cbr\u003e■ \u003cb\u003eThe Knight\u003c\/b\u003e, for whom loyalty is everything, becomes \u003cb\u003ethe Mercenary\u003c\/b\u003e, who is perpetually self-serving.\u003cbr\u003e\u003cbr\u003eUsing psychology, philosophy, and her own experience, Daskal offers a breakthrough perspective on leadership. She’ll take you inside some of the most cloistered boardrooms, let you in on deeply personal conversations with industry leaders, and introduce you to luminaries who’ve changed the world. Her insights will help you rethink everything you know to become the leader you truly want to be.“Our weaknesses live in the shadows of our strengths, and this book does more than help us spot them—it shows us how to overcome them. Lolly Daskal takes us into the trenches of her executive coaching practice, carefully unpacking the self-awareness gaps that hold leaders back and lighting the path to expanding our comfort zones.” \u003cbr\u003e\u003cb\u003e—Adam Grant\u003c\/b\u003e, author of \u003ci\u003eOriginals\u003c\/i\u003e and \u003ci\u003eGive and Take\u003cbr\u003e\u003cbr\u003e\u003c\/i\u003e“I’ve seen talented leaders unwittingly make the biggest mistakes of their careers simply because they don’t understand the complexities and pitfalls of their own strengths. \u003ci\u003eThe Leadership Gap\u003c\/i\u003e offers terrific insight and valuable wisdom for high achievers who want to understand the tendencies that stand between them and meaningful success.”\u003cbr\u003e\u003cb\u003e—Sydney Finkelstein\u003c\/b\u003e, author of \u003ci\u003eSuperbosses\u003c\/i\u003e and \u003ci\u003eWhy Smart Executives Fail\u003cbr\u003e\u003cbr\u003e\u003c\/i\u003e“Great leaders understand who they are as leaders and what motivates them to do the things they do. If you want to become one of them, read Lolly Daskal’s deeply insightful book. It has invaluable advice for leaders who want to propel themselves to the next level. It’s essential reading for those who want to be great.”\u003cbr\u003e\u003cb\u003e—Heidi Grant Halvorson\u003c\/b\u003e, author of \u003ci\u003eNo One Understands You and What to Do About It\u003cbr\u003e\u003cbr\u003e\u003c\/i\u003e“\u003ci\u003eThe Leadership Gap\u003c\/i\u003e is an exciting new contribution to the tired conversation of leadership and artfully explains why some leaders succeed while others don’t. Lolly Daskal draws on a wealth of expertise as a leading global leadership consultant to identify the skills and gaps that exist within all of us.”\u003cbr\u003e\u003cb\u003e—Cy Wakeman\u003c\/b\u003e, author of \u003ci\u003eReality-Based Leadership\u003cbr\u003e\u003cbr\u003e\u003c\/i\u003e“As a leader there’s one thing standing between you and your ultimate potential. Once you are aware of it, once you embrace it, and once you know how to close that ‘gap,’ you can then become the magnificent leader you are meant to be.”\u003cbr\u003e\u003cb\u003e—Bob Burg\u003c\/b\u003e, coauthor of \u003ci\u003eThe Go-Giver\u003c\/i\u003e\u003cb\u003eLOLLY DASKAL\u003c\/b\u003e is the founder of Lead from Within, a global leadership, executive coaching, and consulting firm based in New York City. With more than thirty years of experience with some of the world’s largest and most successful companies, Daskal is one of today’s most sought-after executive leadership coaches and leadership consultants. She has written thousands of articles and columns for a variety of media, including \u003ci\u003eInc.\u003c\/i\u003e, \u003ci\u003eHarvard Business Review\u003c\/i\u003e, \u003ci\u003eFast Company\u003c\/i\u003e, \u003ci\u003eHuffington Post\u003c\/i\u003e, and \u003ci\u003ePsychology Today\u003c\/i\u003e.Chapter One\u003cbr\u003e\u003cbr\u003e The Surprising Gap in        Our Leadership\u003cbr\u003e\u003cbr\u003e Greatness lies in the gaps between where you are and where you      want to be.\u003cbr\u003e\u003cbr\u003e When chief executives come to me for coaching, they generally want      me to help them with any of a vast array of leadership,      management, and strategic challenges specific to their situation.      I've consulted with executives in almost every      industry-technology, shipping, consumer products, pharmaceuticals,      finance, and more-and every situation that I encounter is unique.\u003cbr\u003e\u003cbr\u003e I work with leaders who are smart, nice, and even power hungry-all      at once. Some excel at one quality, yet are weak in another. This      is natural-it's the human condition. My job as a coach is to      integrate all of an executive's qualities-weak and strong alike-to      help him become a more balanced leader.\u003cbr\u003e\u003cbr\u003e I have had clients who were masters at solving manufacturing      problems, but they could not begin to solve people conflicts. I      have worked with great visionaries who could not implement plans      to achieve goals. I have had clients who were rapturous public      speakers, but they were really bad at listening. Each leader has      his own way of being, but the ones who make their mark on the      world come to understand that great leadership has many facets,      and all must be nurtured. Great leaders learn to expand their      talents and develop their deficiencies.\u003cbr\u003e\u003cbr\u003e What all talented leaders have in common is that they are good at      what they do, and they all want to be great. So, ultimately, my      job is to help them identify what stands between them and their      greatness-what I call their leadership gap.\u003cbr\u003e\u003cbr\u003e Many leaders I work with rise to executive roles on the basis of      one talent, not realizing that successful leadership requires      many. I help them to rethink what they think they know-and      pinpoint what they don't know-in order to cultivate the skills      they never imagined they needed. I know how to spot people with      great leadership potential: they are the ones who refuse to be      stuck in their ways. They realize that there is a gap between      where they are and where they want to be, and they are willing to      rethink what they don't know to overcome that gap.\u003cbr\u003e\u003cbr\u003e I have seen the techniques I use with my clients change lives, and      I want to teach you how to apply these techniques to change your      own life.\u003cbr\u003e\u003cbr\u003e The chief executives I serve often find themselves in unbelievably      challenging circumstances that may appear to have no good      solution. As their coach, I help them find the wisdom to make      clarity out of complexity, inject meaning into what they do, and      give them hope. Some of my clients have responsibility for many      thousands of people-each of whom has his or her own needs and      problems that demand attention. Regardless of how successful      executives become, or how high they fly, we must remember      leadership is a privilege. \u003cbr\u003e\u003cbr\u003e As Viktor Frankl explained, we never stop hoping for things to be      better: \"Everything can be taken from a man but one thing: the      last of the human freedoms-to choose one's attitude in any given      set of circumstances, to choose one's own way.\" He understood that      when we are no longer able to change a situation, we are      challenged to change ourselves.\u003cbr\u003e\u003cbr\u003e Au: Source?\u003cbr\u003e\u003cbr\u003e Frankl also understood the wisdom in our gaps. As he once wisely      said, \"Between stimulus and response there is a space. In that      space is our power to choose our response. In our response lie our      growth and our freedom.\"\u003cbr\u003e\u003cbr\u003e Without question, my job is to help my clients get to where they      want to go in their careers. In my practice, this begins with      helping them understand who they are-not superficially, but      deeply-which means acknowledging the parts of their personality      they feel the need to hide or keep secret. These are the parts      that have been created and cultivated out of fear, ignorance,      shame, or rejection. Together we find the gap that keeps them from      becoming who they want to be. Carl Jung calls this gap the      shadow-\"the person you would rather not be.\"\u003cbr\u003e\u003cbr\u003e To make a dynamic shift from where leaders are to where they want      to be, I help them rethink what they know. My technique for      achieving this can be understood through a set of leadership      archetypes that were inspired by Carl Jung. My system of      archetypes makes it easy to see yourself objectively. Once you      have that clarity, you'll have the awareness not only to identify      your leadership gaps, but to leverage those gaps from within and      to move toward your greatness. You'll be equipped to rethink what      you know, what you believe, and what you call truth. The      archetypes that are at the heart of this book will enable you to      understand yourself and your leadership style in ways you never      imagined possible.\u003cbr\u003e\u003cbr\u003e It's important to note that I don't believe anyone has one fixed      set of characteristics, neatly boxed up in an archetype. A human      being is a unique combination of many parts consisting of      polarities that create a whole person. I see leadership style as      an arc that is in a constant state of movement and change-we shift      from one style to another depending on the situation. But at one      time or another, in one circumstance or another, we tend to lean      repeatedly toward the same archetype persona. While this may be      the case, we are in reality an amalgam of all the archetypes.\u003cbr\u003e\u003cbr\u003e Take the truth teller archetype, for example. If you're someone      who values truth, constantly speaking truth may feel as if it's a      force within you. And if you're like Michael, then leading with      truth is nonnegotiable.\u003cbr\u003e\u003cbr\u003e Michael is an extremely accomplished man who embodies success. And      if there's anything that the people who work for Michael know,      it's that he has no tolerance for liars. The reason they know this      is because Michael talks about it incessantly. He often      pontificates about how wrong it is to lie, and how he would never      do it. Unbeknownst to Michael, this drives the people around him      crazy.\u003cbr\u003e\u003cbr\u003e So when Michael discovered one day that many of the people in his      organization not only did not admire him for his utmost honesty,      but actually wanted to stay away from him, he was shocked to the      core. He couldn't understand why people found him difficult simply      because his standards were so high. So he sought my advice.\u003cbr\u003e\u003cbr\u003e \"I'm not sure what I'm supposed to do,\" he said. \"Isn't it a good      thing to have high standards? Why don't they respect me?\"\u003cbr\u003e\u003cbr\u003e I explained to Michael that what he viewed as a high standard-not      tolerating liars-was creating a wedge between him and his team,      his company, and the other important relationships in his life.\u003cbr\u003e\u003cbr\u003e Of course, this was not the feedback Michael wanted to hear and it      frustrated him. \"I am committed to doing business in a very honest      and truthful way. I will not lie,\" he firmly said, \"even if at      times my truthfulness costs me in business.\"\u003cbr\u003e\u003cbr\u003e Leadership gaps are invisible and insidious-especially to those      who have them. I knew I needed to get Michael to look at himself      in a way he never had so that he could rethink not only what he      was saying, but what he was doing and why.\u003cbr\u003e\u003cbr\u003e I began by asking him questions about his success. He had many      great stories, one grander than the next. Then I asked him about      his past-what stood out and what propelled his success. Michael's      response was focused on his honor, how he avoids lying at all      costs, and his belief that because he didn't lie, he prevailed in      business. Telling the truth was paramount to Michael.\u003cbr\u003e\u003cbr\u003e Once he became more comfortable with me and let down his guard, I      had another question for Michael.\u003cbr\u003e\u003cbr\u003e \"Has there been a time in your life when you lied?\" I asked.\u003cbr\u003e\u003cbr\u003e At first he just stared at me, his face expressionless. But then      his eyes quickly grew more intense, and his body language screamed      out to me: How dare you speak to me in this way?\u003cbr\u003e\u003cbr\u003e But after a long, pregnant pause, Michael answered.\u003cbr\u003e\u003cbr\u003e \"I always wanted to be a lawyer. As far back as I can remember, I      would always tell everyone I would be a lawyer. But I didn't take      my education seriously in high school. I thought I could wing it,      because everyone said how smart I was. I knew deep inside that if      I would just apply myself, I would do well, but I never did. And      at the end of high school my report card showed my lack of effort.      I knew I was in trouble. My last chance to change things around      was to do well on my SAT, so I could get into a great college and      law school, and eventually become the lawyer I dreamed of being.\u003cbr\u003e\u003cbr\u003e \"But I knew I could not learn in just a few months all the      information I had ignored during my four years of high school. And      then an opportunity came my way that I could not pass up. Someone      had stolen the SAT test. I used it to prepare myself with the      exact right answers. My high score surprised everyone, including      me. I was ashamed and horrified. And when I got called to the      principal's office and was asked how I did so well on the test, I      lied. Big time.\"\u003cbr\u003e\u003cbr\u003e He cast his eyes away from me, and after another long pause, found      my eyes again. \"I never told anyone the truth.\"\u003cbr\u003e\u003cbr\u003e We sat in silence for a moment and then Michael regained his      composure. \"I promised myself, that day in the principal's office,      that if I got away with this I would never lie again.\"\u003cbr\u003e\u003cbr\u003e I watched as Michael's pride returned. \"It's been more than      forty-seven years now. I took that promise to heart-I am an honest      man, and I make it my business to always tell the truth.\"\u003cbr\u003e\u003cbr\u003e And there, in front of him, was Michael's leadership gap. We could      both see it.\u003cbr\u003e\u003cbr\u003e He had been lying to himself for forty-seven years.\u003cbr\u003e\u003cbr\u003e Because, you see, what you don't own, owns you.\u003cbr\u003e\u003cbr\u003e Michael thought he had come to terms with his lie, but actually it      had been wreaking havoc on him for years and he was unable to see      it.\u003cbr\u003e\u003cbr\u003e Telling the truth became such a strong mantra for Michael that it      was getting in the way of his ability to connect with people. But      most of all, the way he prioritized truth above all else created      gaps between himself and others. This insight was completely      counterintuitive to him.\u003cbr\u003e\u003cbr\u003e Michael always complained that he was misunderstood. Despite all      his accomplishments, he was never satisfied with his life. He      feared intimate relationships and he kept friends at arm's length      to make sure that they would never discover his secret. He thought      his high standards were admirable, but in reality his constant      vigilance exhausted him and alienated others. Michael was so      afraid of anyone discovering his indiscretion that he avoided      getting close to people. Meanwhile, people disliked him and would      lie about his positive effect on them, which created a      destructive, vicious cycle.\u003cbr\u003e\u003cbr\u003e After this moment of clarity, Michael said he felt good for the      first time in a long while. He had not realized how he was      suppressing his past, or how he carried it with him.\u003cbr\u003e\u003cbr\u003e \"I can see that you don't judge me,\" he said.\u003cbr\u003e\u003cbr\u003e \"I don't,\" I told him.\u003cbr\u003e\u003cbr\u003e After all, I wasn't there to make it right for him, but I wasn't      going to let a lie from forty-seven years ago continue to haunt      him to this day. I reassured Michael that no one can live up to      his standard-everyone lies at one time or another.\u003cbr\u003e\u003cbr\u003e The next week when Michael and I met for our coaching session, I      noticed he looked more at ease with himself.\u003cbr\u003e\u003cbr\u003e \"Lolly, I don't know why, but I feel so much lighter and more      relaxed,\" he said. \"I see things I didn't see before. I am having      easier conversations and making connections with people, and I      feel more engaged. What did you do?\"\u003cbr\u003e\u003cbr\u003e I explained to Michael that the reason he felt lighter was because      the secrets that create gaps in our lives weigh us down as if we      are carrying stones. \"Imagine I handed you a grapefruit,\" I told      Michael, \"and then asked you to hold it somewhere so that no one      would ever see it. The sheer effort of constantly holding the      grapefruit would be challenging, but keeping it hidden would be      even harder. Your secret was just as burdensome. And over the      years it created a wedge-a gap in who you are.\u003cbr\u003e\u003cbr\u003e \"But when you allow yourself to show someone your grapefruit,\" I      continued, \"it relieves you. And it helps you feel lighter,      happier, and utterly liberated. By sharing your story with me, you      not only released your biggest burden, but now you can see the gap      you had created and can leverage that knowledge to achieve      greatness.\"\u003cbr\u003e\u003cbr\u003e We are not just what we think. We are what we hide. And we all      have something we are ashamed of. The situation may not be as      severe as what Michael endured for so many years, but we all have      stories we tell ourselves that make us feel vulnerable, angry, and      even afraid. These secrets and patterns create our leadership gap.\u003cbr\u003e\u003cbr\u003e Once Michael unburdened himself from his lie, he could stop      overcompensating for it by emphasizing truth. He could choose to      be more human and empathetic-people make mistakes.\u003cbr\u003e\u003cbr\u003e Together we worked toward Michael learning to accept himself in      all his glorious imperfections. After just one month, Michael was      already becoming a much better person, and a greater leader. The      change was evident to everyone on his team and in his company. But      more than anything, Michael was grateful because now he could be      authentic like never before.\u003cbr\u003e\u003cbr\u003e Being real is the first step to being great.\u003cbr\u003e\u003cbr\u003e As humans we will never be perfect, but we can be the best      versions of ourselves. And the way to become the best versions of      ourselves is to recognize our leadership gaps, leverage our      knowledge in new ways, and stand in our greatness. It's about      learning the two sides of who we are-the side that serves us, and      the deceptively identical side that does a disservice to us.\u003cbr\u003e\u003cbr\u003e As leaders, each of us must confront our leadership gaps,      especially when we're anxious or frustrated or under great stress.\u003cbr\u003e\u003cbr\u003e During the course of my many years as an executive coach and      adviser, I have found these fundamental truths to be true:\u003cbr\u003e\u003cbr\u003e We are all capable of standing in our greatness. Every human being      is born with a healthy emotional system. We come into this world      without fear, without shame. We don't make judgments about which      parts of ourselves are good and which parts are bad. Rather, we      dream about doing something bigger than ourselves-we have ideas,      thoughts, visions, hopes. Some of us have ideals that are bigger      than others', but we all have great visions for ourselves. Until,      somewhere along the way, those visions get diluted. Maybe it was      the teacher who called you stupid; the parent who said you could      do better; the bully who taunted you; the sports coach who called      you inadequate. Whatever that message was, you heard it and      internalized it. You made the message stick, and because you did,      you didn't think you could stand in your greatness.","brand":"Portfolio","offers":[{"title":"Default Title","offer_id":46303990350053,"sku":"NP9781101981351","price":28.0,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":false}],"thumbnail_url":"\/\/cdn.shopify.com\/s\/files\/1\/1842\/7735\/files\/9781101981351_b7078393-ae99-446c-8050-89b7f2ae2cc6.jpg?v=1730755995","url":"https:\/\/k12savings.com\/products\/the-leadership-gapisbn-9781101981351","provider":"K12savings","version":"1.0","type":"link"}