{"product_id":"the-girl-i-used-to-be-isbn-9780399585036","title":"The Girl I Used to Be","description":"\u003cb\u003eThe acclaimed author of \u003ci\u003eGone Without a Trace \u003c\/i\u003edelivers another twisting novel of psychological suspense in which a woman is backed against a wall--with nothing left to lose...\u003c\/b\u003e\u003cbr\u003e\u003cbr\u003eThe morning after real estate agent Gemma Brogan has dinner with a prospective client, she's furious at herself for drinking so much. But there will be more to regret than a nasty hangover.\u003cbr\u003e\u003cbr\u003eShe starts receiving mementos from that night: A photo of a hallway kiss. A video of her complaining about her husband. And worse...much worse. The problem is she doesn't remember any of it.\u003cbr\u003e\u003cbr\u003eAs the blackmailing and menace ramp up, Gemma fears for her already shaky marriage. The paranoia, the feeling that her life is spiraling out of control, will take her back to another night--years ago--that changed everything. And Gemma will realize just how far the shadows from her past can reach...\u003cb\u003ePraise for \u003ci\u003eGone Without a Trace\u003c\/i\u003e\u003c\/b\u003e\u003cbr\u003e  \u003cbr\u003e “Mary Torjussen spins a clever, fast-paced tale with a twist so sharp it will give readers whiplash.”—Tami Hoag, #1\u003ci\u003e New York Times\u003c\/i\u003e bestselling author of \u003ci\u003eThe Bitter Season\u003c\/i\u003e \u003cbr\u003e  \u003cbr\u003e “\u003ci\u003eGone Without a Trace\u003c\/i\u003e has one of the most interesting narrators I’ve ever come across. Suspenseful and subtle, this novel plays with all of your expectations. Not to be missed!”—Shari Lapena, \u003ci\u003eNew York Times\u003c\/i\u003e bestselling author of \u003ci\u003eThe Couple Next Door\u003c\/i\u003e\u003cbr\u003e\u003cbr\u003e “Gripping suspense with a chilling twist. Mary Torjussen kept me turning the pages to the very last.”—Meg Gardiner, Edgar Award–winning author of \u003ci\u003eUnsub\u003c\/i\u003e \u003cbr\u003e\u003cbr\u003e“Torjussen’s debut novel combines tightly wound suspense with an unfolding surprise ending, making for a gripping page-turner from start to finish. Fans of Gillian Flynn’s \u003ci\u003eGone Girl\u003c\/i\u003e and Alafair Burke’s \u003ci\u003eIf You Were Here\u003c\/i\u003e will love this.”—\u003ci\u003eLibrary Journal\u003c\/i\u003e (starred review)\u003cbr\u003e  \u003cbr\u003e “Grabbed me right away with its mind-blowing and heartbreaking premise, and I couldn’t read fast enough as the book revealed a series of twisting and even jaw-dropping surprises. This thriller thrills, but it’s grounded by complicated, complex, and sometimes deeply flawed characters I couldn't stop thinking about. An absorbing, shocking thriller!”—David Bell, bestselling author of\u003ci\u003e Bring Her Home\u003c\/i\u003e\u003cbr\u003e  \u003cbr\u003e “[A] strong debut....The deliciously dark conclusion is perfect for this tale of all-consuming obsession, jealousy, and the secrets that lie beneath the most perfect of exteriors.”—\u003ci\u003ePublishers Weekly\u003c\/i\u003e\u003cbr\u003e\u003cbr\u003e“Will keep readers on the edges of their seats as they delve into Hannah’s troubled mind....Readers will be absorbed in this hard look at human nature and the lengths we will go to protect what we feel is ours.”—\u003ci\u003eBooklist\u003c\/i\u003e\u003cbr\u003e\u003cbr\u003e“Torjussen draws you into Hannah’s plight until you’re wrapped in it like the coils of an anaconda. It’s a maze of madness and obsession that holds you until the final devastating line of the story.”—\u003ci\u003eSuspense Magazine\u003c\/i\u003e \u003cbr\u003e\u003cbr\u003e“[A] creepy, adrenaline fueled thriller....Fans of Claire Mackintosh and J.T. Ellison will find plenty here to love. The concept is unique, with a clever setup that hooks on page one....The writing is sleek, the pace is propulsive, and the tale’s tension remains palpable throughout. In a subgenre where third-act twists are the norm, \u003ci\u003eGone Without a Trace \u003c\/i\u003eis the rare domestic thriller that simultaneously shocks, challenges convention, and delivers an important social message....the book’s final page is guaranteed to chill.”—\u003ci\u003eMystery Scene Magazine\u003cbr\u003e\u003cbr\u003e\u003c\/i\u003e“[An] engrossing psychological thriller....Paula Hawkins fans will find a lot to like.”—\u003ci\u003ePublishers Weekly\u003cbr\u003e\u003cbr\u003e\u003c\/i\u003e\u003cb\u003eMary Torjussen\u003c\/b\u003e is the acclaimed author of \u003ci\u003eGone Without a Trace\u003c\/i\u003e. She has an MA in Creative Writing from Liverpool John Moores University and worked for several years as a teacher.one\u003cbr\u003e\u003cbr\u003e Present day\u003cbr\u003e\u003cbr\u003e Friday, June 16\u003cbr\u003e\u003cbr\u003e When I saw him for the first time, I didn't think he'd be trouble.      He was tall and broad, built like a rugby player, nice enough, I      suppose, but not the kind of man you'd necessarily look twice at      in the street. At first glance he looked harmless enough. That's      how men like him operate, I suppose.\u003cbr\u003e\u003cbr\u003e I saw him that morning, looking at the advertising boards in the      window of the estate agency I own, but didn't take a lot of notice      at first. Over the course of a day maybe a hundred or so people      will look at the boards, trying to decide which house they'd buy      if they had the chance, and I'd quickly learned that an expression      of interest did not mean a sale. He looked for a while, moving      from the cheapest houses to the most expensive. I remember idly      wondering what he was looking for.\u003cbr\u003e\u003cbr\u003e When he did come in, he hung about in the doorway, as though he      were waiting for someone. I glanced around and saw that Rachel,      our sales negotiator, was at the photocopier and Brian, our      lettings manager, was busy with a tenant. Usually we leave clients      to look around, but he seemed uncertain, so I caught his eye and      smiled.\u003cbr\u003e\u003cbr\u003e \"Good morning,\" I said. \"Can I help you with anything?\"\u003cbr\u003e\u003cbr\u003e \"I'm David Sanderson,\" he said, coming to sit at my desk. \"I have      an appointment.\"\u003cbr\u003e\u003cbr\u003e \"Oh yes,\" I said, flustered. He was an hour earlier than I'd      expected and I'd planned to run out to meet my friend Grace for      coffee for half an hour. \"Hi. I'm Gemma Brogan.\" We shook hands.      \"Just a moment, I'll call up your details.\"\u003cbr\u003e\u003cbr\u003e While I did that, I surreptitiously sent Grace a quick e-mail.      Sorry, can't meet. Another day?\u003cbr\u003e\u003cbr\u003e \"So you're looking for somewhere in the city center,\" I said. \"I      can see you've selected a number you like the look of.\"\u003cbr\u003e\u003cbr\u003e \"I'm still not sure whether to go for an apartment or a house,\" he      said. He smiled then, a great smile that made his face light up.      It transformed him from someone you wouldn't really notice to      someone you'd definitely remember. I couldn't help but smile back.      \"I'm not sure if I'm ready for a house. I'd rather be near some      bars and a gym.\"\u003cbr\u003e\u003cbr\u003e \"Will you be buying on your own?\"\u003cbr\u003e\u003cbr\u003e I could see Sophie, our junior administrator, who was always on      the lookout for a boyfriend, give a sidelong look at Rachel. I      could tell from the way they both became very still that they were      waiting for his answer.\u003cbr\u003e\u003cbr\u003e \"Yes, I'm single,\" he said. \"I'm just looking for somewhere for      myself.\"\u003cbr\u003e\u003cbr\u003e I reckoned he was around my age, in his midthirties. Now that he      was at ease and smiling, it was hard to believe he wasn't snapped      up already, though of course he could be divorced.\u003cbr\u003e\u003cbr\u003e \"Are you from Chester?\" I asked. \"I'm trying to place your      accent.\"\u003cbr\u003e\u003cbr\u003e \"I grew up in the northwest but I've been working over in the      States for the last ten years or so. Boston. My company's      transferred me to the UK for a while. A few years, I guess. I've      sold up over there; no point in keeping the old place going.\"\u003cbr\u003e\u003cbr\u003e \"Who're you working for?\"\u003cbr\u003e\u003cbr\u003e \"Barford's. I'm in sales.\"\u003cbr\u003e\u003cbr\u003e I nodded. Barford's was a large pharmaceutical company that had      its headquarters on an industrial estate just outside Chester. I'd      found properties for a couple of people there; it was supposed to      be a great place to work.\u003cbr\u003e\u003cbr\u003e He clarified the price he was willing to spend; it was in the      upper ballpark of properties in Chester, and I started to get      excited. We had plenty of properties on our books. Things were      moving more slowly than usual and I knew I could find him      something. He'd named a great price and he was willing to try out      a lot of different areas. I had to sell to him. I didn't want to      have to come back to the office and tell my staff that he had      decided to go elsewhere.\u003cbr\u003e\u003cbr\u003e \"I'll get some details,\" I said. \"I won't be a moment.\" I saw that      Sophie was busy with a client, so I called over to Rachel, who was      putting brochures in the window. \"Rachel, would you make Mr.      Sanderson a drink, please?\" It wasn't her job to do that, but in      such a small office we all had to take on that duty if someone      else was busy.\u003cbr\u003e\u003cbr\u003e She came over to my desk. \"Would you like tea or coffee?\"\u003cbr\u003e\u003cbr\u003e \"I'll have coffee, thanks,\" he said.\u003cbr\u003e\u003cbr\u003e \"How do you like it?\"\u003cbr\u003e\u003cbr\u003e I glanced at her and had to stop myself from laughing. Her face      was pink and she couldn't bring herself to meet his eyes. She and      Sophie were always the same when a good-looking guy came into the      office. They were both young and single, though Sophie had nerves      of steel when it came to dating, while Rachel seemed more shy and      nervous.\u003cbr\u003e\u003cbr\u003e He smiled at her. \"White, no sugar, thanks.\"\u003cbr\u003e\u003cbr\u003e She blushed again and disappeared into our tiny kitchen behind the      office. Sophie swiftly followed her and I could hear muffled      giggles.\u003cbr\u003e\u003cbr\u003e We drank the coffee and went through the details of some of the      properties I had. He seemed particularly interested in the      apartments that overlooked the River Dee and others that were in      the center of the city.\u003cbr\u003e\u003cbr\u003e I glanced at the office diaries online. I would normally send      Rachel out, but she had another appointment that morning. I had a      valuation in several hours' time, at four p.m. \"You said in your      e-mail you were free until three p.m. I can take you to view some      properties now, if you like.\"\u003cbr\u003e\u003cbr\u003e \"That would be great,\" he said. \"I'd love to look around this      area; I don't know it well at all.\"\u003cbr\u003e\u003cbr\u003e \"Just give me a few minutes,\" I said. \"I'll make a few calls and      get my keys.\"\u003cbr\u003e\u003cbr\u003e \"I can drive us if you like.\"\u003cbr\u003e\u003cbr\u003e \"It's fine, thanks,\" I said. \"It'll be easier if I drive. I know      the quickest routes.\"\u003cbr\u003e\u003cbr\u003e I asked Sophie to take some details from him and he went over to      sit with her. Sophie was only eighteen and fresh from school. She      was still learning the ropes; I'd had to weigh up experience      versus cost when I'd employed her and still wasn't sure I'd made      the right decision. As I made my calls I saw her, her face bright      with excitement, asking David for his details and laboriously      entering them into the computer.\u003cbr\u003e\u003cbr\u003e I always drive round to the front of the office to pick up      clients, so that they donÕt have to go through the back and into      the car park. As soon as he got into my little car I could see I      should have let him drive his own. He was over six feet tall with      long legs and broad shoulders, and he looked really cramped in the      passenger seat.\u003cbr\u003e\u003cbr\u003e \"I'm sorry!\" I said as he struggled with the seat belt. \"Shall we      go in your car? I can direct you.\"\u003cbr\u003e\u003cbr\u003e \"It's fine.\" He turned and grinned at me. \"I used to drive a      Mini.\"\u003cbr\u003e\u003cbr\u003e I laughed.\u003cbr\u003e\u003cbr\u003e \"My mum bought herself one when I was seventeen,\" he said. \"I      think she thought it would put me off borrowing it.\"\u003cbr\u003e\u003cbr\u003e \"And did it?\"\u003cbr\u003e\u003cbr\u003e \"No, but I saved up for my own much quicker than I would have if      she'd had a bigger car.\"\u003cbr\u003e\u003cbr\u003e \"Clever woman. I'll have to remember that when my son's old enough      to drive.\"\u003cbr\u003e\u003cbr\u003e \"How old is he now?\"\u003cbr\u003e\u003cbr\u003e \"Three.\" I smiled. Every time I thought of Rory, I smiled. \"Plenty      of time to go.\"\u003cbr\u003e\u003cbr\u003e The first property I took him to was an apartment block set in a      gated courtyard within the city walls. As I drove, he asked      questions about the area and I talked to him about the old Roman      walls that encircled the city.\u003cbr\u003e\u003cbr\u003e \"Walking around the walls of the city is a great way to get to      know Chester,\" I said. \"It's a couple of miles and you follow the      wall around-it's virtually complete. You get to see the      racecourse, the castle, and the cathedral as well as the River      Dee. So you can see, it's a pretty small city, but it's got a lot      going for it.\"\u003cbr\u003e\u003cbr\u003e \"Have you lived here long?\" he asked.\u003cbr\u003e\u003cbr\u003e I nodded and told him I'd grown up on the Wirral, twenty-five      miles north of Chester. \"I moved down to London to university and      then moved here.\"\u003cbr\u003e\u003cbr\u003e \"You were in London? I was there, too. Imperial. I studied maths.      How about you?\"\u003cbr\u003e\u003cbr\u003e \"Queen Mary's. Business. I graduated in 2005.\"\u003cbr\u003e\u003cbr\u003e \"Me too!\" He grinned at me. \"That's weird. And then you moved back      north?\"\u003cbr\u003e\u003cbr\u003e \"I always wanted to work for myself, but it's virtually impossible      in London, so I moved here about seven years ago when I decided to      open my own business. I love it here.\"\u003cbr\u003e\u003cbr\u003e \"That's your own agency? You've done pretty well.\"\u003cbr\u003e\u003cbr\u003e \"Thanks. I love having my own place.\"\u003cbr\u003e\u003cbr\u003e I was really proud of myself for owning my own business. It had      always been my dream. I trained as an estate agent immediately      after graduating, and worked down in London for a few years. Sales      were high in those days, so my commission was, too, and I saved as      much as I could, knowing I wanted my own place in the future. When      I met Joe, we decided to head north so I could set up on my own.      It would have been impossible to do that in London. I have a few      properties that I've bought to rent out, too. It seemed crazy not      to, when there were cheap houses coming up at auction. We're      managing agents for a number of landlords, so it's just as easy to      manage mine at the same time.\u003cbr\u003e\u003cbr\u003e \"It's a big responsibility, though, isn't it?\"\u003cbr\u003e\u003cbr\u003e I nodded. \"It's a lot of work sometimes, but I love working for      myself.\"\u003cbr\u003e\u003cbr\u003e \"I'd love to do that,\" he said. \"I'm in a great job, but there's      something about having your own business . . . I'd really like to      try it. Did you buy an existing agency?\"\u003cbr\u003e\u003cbr\u003e \"Yes, I bought one that had been running for a few years.\"\u003cbr\u003e\u003cbr\u003e What did you do about staff?\"\u003cbr\u003e\u003cbr\u003e \"Brian, the older guy who was in the office when you came in, was      someone I inherited. He was a lifesaver; he's worked in lettings      for years and knows all the local landlords and tradespeople. I      leave the letting side to him, though he's heading for retirement      now and works shorter weeks. It won't be too long before I have to      look for a replacement for him, I suppose. I hired the women      myself.\"\u003cbr\u003e\u003cbr\u003e We arrived at the first apartment and took the lift to the fifth      floor. The previous owners had already moved, so a sale could go      ahead quickly.\u003cbr\u003e\u003cbr\u003e \"Hmm, this is pretty nice,\" he said. \"How long has it been      unoccupied?\"\u003cbr\u003e\u003cbr\u003e \"They've just moved out,\" I said. \"Last month. May. It's much      better that it's empty; you could move in within weeks. You'll      probably find there's room to maneuver on the price, too. If the      vendor's still paying a mortgage, they'll want a fast sale.\"\u003cbr\u003e\u003cbr\u003e He went over to the window and opened the doors to the balcony      that overlooked the central courtyard. There was space out there      for a small table and a couple of chairs. He closed the doors      without comment, then went into the bathroom. There was nothing to      complain about there and he went into the kitchen, pulling out      drawers and opening cupboards. Everything there was high spec; it      was just the kind of place I thought he'd like.\u003cbr\u003e\u003cbr\u003e \"What do you think?\" He smiled over at me. \"Could you see me      here?\"\u003cbr\u003e\u003cbr\u003e I laughed. \"It's a great city center apartment. Well, on the edge      of the city, which is better, really. You don't get the noise.\"\u003cbr\u003e\u003cbr\u003e \"Oh, I don't know,\" he said. \"It's pretty noisy out there, when      the French doors are open.\"\u003cbr\u003e\u003cbr\u003e \"Really? It seems quiet to me. Well, it's the middle of the day,      so there'll be a lot of tourists and shoppers. At night it'd be      much quieter.\"\u003cbr\u003e\u003cbr\u003e He nodded. \"Let's go. Where's next?\"\u003cbr\u003e\u003cbr\u003e Next was a house in a popular area a couple of miles from the      center of town. It had its own busy center, with bars and      restaurants, gyms and shops.\u003cbr\u003e\u003cbr\u003e \"Houses move quickly here,\" I said as I showed him around. \"This      one's only been on the market for a few days and I'm expecting it      to go by the end of the month.\"\u003cbr\u003e\u003cbr\u003e \"Sounds great,\" he said. \"I could be living here within a couple      of months.\"\u003cbr\u003e\u003cbr\u003e I smiled, absolutely certain that pretty soon he'd be making an      offer on one of our properties.\u003cbr\u003e\u003cbr\u003e By midafternoon, though, I'd shown him six places, and although      he'd enthused about them all, when I dropped him off at the office      he made no suggestion that he'd be taking any of them further.\u003cbr\u003e\u003cbr\u003e \"I'll be in touch in the next few days,\" he said.\u003cbr\u003e\u003cbr\u003e \"Great!\" I smiled at him. \"I'll look forward to it.\"\u003cbr\u003e\u003cbr\u003e \"Any luck?\" asked Sophie as I entered the office.\u003cbr\u003e\u003cbr\u003e I frowned. A number of people were looking at houses listed on the      boards and looked up in interest when she called out.\u003cbr\u003e\u003cbr\u003e \"Can I see you for a moment?\" I asked, and went into the kitchen      to wait for her. She bounced in, but the smile left her face when      I reminded her not to call out in the office. \"Just e-mail me or      ask me quietly if it's busy out there.\"\u003cbr\u003e\u003cbr\u003e She squirmed with embarrassment. \"Sorry.\"\u003cbr\u003e\u003cbr\u003e Rachel came into the kitchen and filled the kettle for tea.\u003cbr\u003e\u003cbr\u003e I said, \"That's okay,\" to Sophie. I didn't like to reprimand her      while anyone else was around.\u003cbr\u003e\u003cbr\u003e She was only down for a moment, though, before she nudged me,      saying, \"How did it go with that guy? He was nice, wasn't he?\"\u003cbr\u003e\u003cbr\u003e I laughed. \"I could tell you liked him.\"\u003cbr\u003e\u003cbr\u003e \"Tall, dark, and handsome,\" she mused. \"Fit, too. Gorgeous. Rachel      thought he was, too.\"\u003cbr\u003e\u003cbr\u003e \"I did not!\"\u003cbr\u003e\u003cbr\u003e \"Yes, you did. Pity he's too old for us.\"\u003cbr\u003e\u003cbr\u003e I raised my eyebrows. \"He's my age, thanks.\"\u003cbr\u003e\u003cbr\u003e \"That's what I mean.\"\u003cbr\u003e\u003cbr\u003e Rachel, her face scarlet now, nudged her, and I left them to it.\u003cbr\u003e\u003cbr\u003e But later, before we closed the office, I called a meeting so we      could thrash out some ideas for properties for David. We got      together a list of another six that we thought he'd love, and then      I e-mailed him to see whether he wanted to see any of the others.\u003cbr\u003e\u003cbr\u003e He replied immediately.\u003cbr\u003e\u003cbr\u003e They sound great. I particularly liked the third one we saw today,      the one with the view of the racecourse. I need to get my mortgage      sorted out first, though-will be in touch soon.\u003cbr\u003e\u003cbr\u003e I sighed. He'd told me he had his mortgage sorted. It seemed he      was yet another client messing me around. I'd learned from      experience that until someone had got a guaranteed mortgage, they      weren't seriously looking. I guessed we wouldn't be seeing him      again, but I wrote back saying he should let me know if he wanted      me to recommend a financial adviser.\u003cbr\u003e\u003cbr\u003eWill do, he replied. See you soon.","brand":"Berkley","offers":[{"title":"Default Title","offer_id":46305319878885,"sku":"NP9780399585036","price":16.0,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":false}],"thumbnail_url":"\/\/cdn.shopify.com\/s\/files\/1\/1842\/7735\/files\/9780399585036.jpg?v=1767739531","url":"https:\/\/k12savings.com\/products\/the-girl-i-used-to-be-isbn-9780399585036","provider":"K12savings","version":"1.0","type":"link"}