{"product_id":"i-dont-have-to-make-everything-all-better-isbn-9780140286434","title":"I Don't Have to Make Everything All Better","description":"\u003cb\u003eA refreshing and empowering guide for anyone seeking healthier relationships and effective communication\u003c\/b\u003e\u003cbr\u003e\u003cbr\u003eIn their weekly radio show and in their popular workshops, Gary and Joy Lundberg have already helped thousands of people and their families to communicate more effectively. Now, the Lundbergs address an all too common dilemma that arises when others expect you to solve their problems for them, showing readers how they can shed the no-win role of \"fixer\" and empower people to solve their own problems through validation—a simple yet profound communication tool that is essential to any healthy relationship. \u003cbr\u003e\u003cbr\u003eRefreshingly straightforward, this inspiring and entertaining work is poised to become a classic guide for anyone who wishes to improve relationships with their partner, children, colleagues and friends.\u003cb\u003eChapter Two: Principle 2 - Leave the Responsibility Where It Belongs\u003c\/b\u003e\u003cbr\u003eThe Underlying Principle\u003cbr\u003e   Power and Desire\u003cbr\u003eOffering Help\u003cbr\u003eMaking Decisions for Others\u003cbr\u003eResponsibility for the Problem\u003cbr\u003eIf I Offer Help Am I Stuck?\u003cbr\u003e\u003cp\u003e\u003cb\u003eChapter Three: Principle 3 - Acknowledge Emotions\u003c\/b\u003e\u003cbr\u003eThe Four Basic Emotions\u003cbr\u003eEmotions Can Affect Our Physical Well-Being\u003cbr\u003eUnintentional Teaching\u003cbr\u003eSo What Can We Do?\u003cbr\u003eThe Rules of Validation\u003cbr\u003eTo Argue or Not to Argue; That Is the Question\u003cbr\u003eGet Out Of Yourself for a While\u003cbr\u003eIt Takes so Little Time\u003cbr\u003eBegin Today\u003cbr\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003e\u003cb\u003eChapter Four: Principle 4 - Develop the Art of Listening\u003c\/b\u003e\u003cbr\u003eListening Is an Art\u003cbr\u003eListen for Information\u003cbr\u003eRelief for the Listener\u003cbr\u003eThe Art of Questioning\u003cbr\u003eOperative Words\u003cbr\u003eThe Great Invalidator\u003cbr\u003eThe Eyes Give Clues\u003cbr\u003eBegin Today\u003cbr\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003e\u003cb\u003eChapter Five: Principle 5 - Find the Right Time to Teach\u003c\/b\u003e\u003cbr\u003eWhen Does Learning Occur?\u003cbr\u003eWhy Not the Heat of the Moment?\u003cbr\u003eNot All Questions Need Immediate Answers\u003cbr\u003eThe Time to Follow Up\u003cbr\u003ePlanned Teaching Times\u003cbr\u003eMake It Happen\u003cbr\u003eBegin Today\u003cbr\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003e\u003cb\u003eChapter Six: Principle 6 - Learn the Effective Validating Phrases and Questions\u003c\/b\u003e\u003cbr\u003e   Validating Phrases\u003cbr\u003eValidating Questions\u003cbr\u003eBegin Today\u003cbr\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003ePart Two: The Application\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003e\u003cb\u003eChapter Seven - How Validation Works with Young Children\u003c\/b\u003e\u003cbr\u003eBegin with Your Baby\u003cbr\u003eLet Them Feel What They Are Feeling\u003cbr\u003eGive Them a Chance to Solve the Problem\u003cbr\u003eTry Their Point of View\u003cbr\u003eHold On to Your Boundaries\u003cbr\u003eEye to Eye Contact\u003cbr\u003ePut Yourself in Their Shoes\u003cbr\u003eResist Resolving\u003cbr\u003eWhen Illness Strikes\u003cbr\u003eThe Universal Need\u003cbr\u003eBegin Today\u003cbr\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003e\u003cb\u003eChapter Eight: How Validation Works with Teenagers\u003c\/b\u003e\u003cbr\u003eIt's Never Too Late\u003cbr\u003eHelp Them to Start Talking\u003cbr\u003eReinforce Values\u003cbr\u003eBelieve in Them\u003cbr\u003eDiscipline with Validation\u003cbr\u003eControl Yourself\u003cbr\u003eSilence Can Be Validating\u003cbr\u003eThey Can Make Wise Choices\u003cbr\u003eBegin Today\u003cbr\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003e\u003cb\u003eChapter Nine: How Validation Works with Adult Children\u003c\/b\u003e\u003cbr\u003eWe Cannot Control Them\u003cbr\u003eDon't Allow Them to Control You\u003cbr\u003eGive Up Giving Advice\u003cbr\u003eWhen They Blame You\u003cbr\u003eBoomerang Children\u003cbr\u003eWhen Their Lifestyles Don't Match Yours\u003cbr\u003eThe Universal Need\u003cbr\u003eBegin Today\u003cbr\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003e\u003cb\u003eChapter  Ten: How Validation Works with a Spouse\u003c\/b\u003e\u003cbr\u003eWhat Gets in the Way?\u003cbr\u003eWhat to Do About a No Good, Very Bad Day\u003cbr\u003eHandling Disappointment\u003cbr\u003eStop Defending Your Position\u003cbr\u003eDo It Over\u003cbr\u003eThe Male and Female Difference\u003cbr\u003eSetting Family Values\u003cbr\u003eEnjoy Each Other's Dreams\u003cbr\u003ePlan Times Together\u003cbr\u003eSense Each Other's Needs\u003cbr\u003eBegin Today\u003cbr\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003e\u003cb\u003eChapter Eleven: How Validation Works with Parents and Parents-in-Law\u003c\/b\u003e\u003cbr\u003eLet Them Have Their Feelings\u003cbr\u003eDon't Try to Change Their Thinking\u003cbr\u003eLove, Honor, and Set Your Boundaries\u003cbr\u003eDealing with Death\u003cbr\u003eHandling Abusive Behavior\u003cbr\u003eWhen Senility Sets In\u003cbr\u003eIt's What We All Need\u003cbr\u003eBegin Today\u003cbr\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003e\u003cb\u003eChapter Twelve: How Validation Works with Divorced and Blended Families\u003c\/b\u003e\u003cbr\u003eRecognizing the Myths\u003cbr\u003eYou Are Newlyweds\u003cbr\u003eThe Parenting Challenge\u003cbr\u003eDealing with the Loneliness\u003cbr\u003eCommunicating with Your Ex\u003cbr\u003eAnswering the Questions\u003cbr\u003eThe Need for Boundaries\u003cbr\u003eYou Are Not My Dad (Mom)\u003cbr\u003eSetting the Rules in a Blended Family\u003cbr\u003eUnfulfilled Promises\u003cbr\u003eThe More People Who Love\u003cbr\u003eBegin Today\u003cbr\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003e\u003cb\u003eChapter Thirteen: How Validation Works with Friends\u003c\/b\u003e\u003cbr\u003eWe All Need a Friend\u003cbr\u003eDon't Tell a Friend What to Do\u003cbr\u003eSetting Boundaries with Friends\u003cbr\u003eWhen a Friend Loses a Loved One\u003cbr\u003eLet Them Enjoy a Minicatharsis\u003cbr\u003eBegin Today\u003cbr\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003e\u003cb\u003eChapter Fourteen: How Validation Works on the Job\u003c\/b\u003e\u003cbr\u003eCustomer Relations\u003cbr\u003eNot All Needs Can Be Met\u003cbr\u003eCaring Is the Key\u003cbr\u003eWatch for Examples\u003cbr\u003eThe Validating Teacher\u003cbr\u003eValidation - A Life Saver\u003cbr\u003eBelieve in Your Employees\u003cbr\u003eBegin Today\u003cbr\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003e\u003cb\u003eConclusion\u003c\/b\u003e\u003cbr\u003eDo It!\u003cbr\u003eA Song to Lean On\u003cbr\u003eLet Me Be That Someone (Lyrics)\u003cbr\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003ePart Three: The Workbook\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003ePersonal Exercises in the Application of the Six Principles\u003cbr\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003eNotes\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cb\u003eGary Lundberg\u003c\/b\u003e is a licensed marriage and family therapist in private practice. Together with his wife, writer, speaker, lyricist and poet Joy Saunders Lundberg, they co-host a weekly radio show on relationships (\u003ci\u003eMorning with the Lundbergs\u003c\/i\u003e) and present seminars and workshops around the country. They are the parents of five children.\u003cbr\u003e\u003cbr\u003e\u003cb\u003eJoy Saunders Lundberg\u003c\/b\u003e is a writer and speaker. Together with her husband Gary Lundberg she presents seminars and workshops throughout the country and cohosts a weekly radio show on relationships. The parents of five children, they live in Provo, Utah. Meet them on their Web site at www.allbetter.net.","brand":"Penguin Books","offers":[{"title":"Default Title","offer_id":46304570081509,"sku":"NP9780140286434","price":18.0,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":false}],"thumbnail_url":"\/\/cdn.shopify.com\/s\/files\/1\/1842\/7735\/files\/9780140286434.jpg?v=1767729628","url":"https:\/\/k12savings.com\/products\/i-dont-have-to-make-everything-all-better-isbn-9780140286434","provider":"K12savings","version":"1.0","type":"link"}