{"product_id":"i-could-do-anything-if-i-only-knew-what-it-was-isbn-9780440505006","title":"I Could Do Anything If I Only Knew What It Was","description":"\u003cb\u003e\u003ci\u003eNEW YORK TIMES\u003c\/i\u003e BESTSELLER • A life-changing guide to finding your direction—and your passion—in a world of seemingly limitless options\u003c\/b\u003e\u003cbr\u003e\u003cb\u003e \u003c\/b\u003e\u003cbr\u003e\u003cb\u003e“For those who want to find their passion . . . a step-by-step guide for restructuring one’s life so that it has meaning, direction, and joy.”—Ellen Kreidman, author of \u003ci\u003eLight His Fire\u003c\/i\u003e and \u003ci\u003eLight Her Fire\u003c\/i\u003e\u003c\/b\u003e\u003cbr\u003e \u003cbr\u003eIf you suspect there could be more to life than what you’re getting, if you always knew you could do \u003ci\u003eanything\u003c\/i\u003e—if you only knew what it was—this extraordinary book is about to prove you right. No matter what your age, no matter how “unattainable” your dreams, you can create and live a life you love.\u003cbr\u003e \u003cbr\u003e\u003ci\u003eI Could Do Anything If Only I Knew What It Was\u003c\/i\u003e reveals how you can recapture “long lost” goals, overcome the blocks that inhibit your success, decide what you want to be, and live your dreams forever. You will learn:\u003cbr\u003e \u003cbr\u003e• What to do if you never chose to be what you are.\u003cbr\u003e• How to get off the fast track—and on to the \u003ci\u003eright\u003c\/i\u003e track.\u003cbr\u003e• First aid techniques for paralyzing chronic negativity.\u003cbr\u003e• How to regroup when you've lost your big dream.\u003cbr\u003e• To stop waiting for luck—and start creating it.\u003cbr\u003e \u003cbr\u003eA life without direction is a life without passion. \u003ci\u003eI Could Do Anything If Only I Knew What It Was\u003c\/i\u003e guides you not to another unsatisfying job but to a richly rewarding career rooted in your heart’s desire.“Refreshingly witty and wise . . . Full of genuine and useful insight for achieving what you want from a career.”\u003cb\u003e—Wess Roberts, Ph.D., author of \u003ci\u003eLeadership Secrets of Attila the Hun\u003c\/i\u003e\u003cbr\u003e\u003c\/b\u003e\u003cb\u003eBarbara Sher\u003c\/b\u003e is a therapist and career counselor who conducts workshops all over the United States and throughout the world. She has been featured on \u003ci\u003eOprah\u003c\/i\u003e and\u003ci\u003e Donahue\u003c\/i\u003e, as well as in \u003ci\u003eThe Wall Street Journal\u003c\/i\u003e,\u003ci\u003e The New York Times\u003c\/i\u003e, and \u003ci\u003eUSA Today\u003c\/i\u003e. Her bestsellers include \u003ci\u003eWishcraft\u003c\/i\u003e,\u003ci\u003e Teamworks!\u003c\/i\u003e, and\u003ci\u003e I Could Do Anything If I Only Knew What It Was\u003c\/i\u003e. Heard on the radio in cities all over America every day, Sher lives in New York City.This book is designed to help you find the good life. By that, I don't mean swimming pools, mansions, and private jets -- unless those are really your big passions. But if you picked up a book called \u003ci\u003eI Could Do Anything If I Only Knew What It Was\u003c\/i\u003e, you're probably looking for a lot more than a swimming pool.\u003cbr\u003e\u003cbr\u003eYou want a life you will love.\u003cbr\u003e\u003cbr\u003eA friend's father got it right when he said \"The good life is when you get up in the morning and can't wait to start all over again.\"\u003cbr\u003e\u003cbr\u003eIs that you? Or does his idea of the good life sound like an unreachable paradise? If you aren't the kind of person who jumps out of bed every morning excited about the day ahead, I know you desperately long to find a goal that will make you feel like my friend's father. You crave work that will spark excitement and energy; you yearn to find the place where you can make your mark. Albert Schweitzer found his place, so did Golda Meir, and so did the kid next door who practiced guitar day and night. They knew how to live. They believed in what they were doing with all their hearts. They \u003ci\u003eknew\u003c\/i\u003e their work was important. When you get near people who are pursuing their heart's desire, you can \u003ci\u003esee\u003c\/i\u003e the intensity on their faces.\u003cbr\u003e\u003cbr\u003eLife is just too short to live without that kind of focus.\u003cbr\u003e\u003cbr\u003eIn the early 1980s, two Harvard psychologists completed a study of people who called themselves happy. And what did happy people have in common? Money? Success? Health? Love?\u003cbr\u003e\u003cbr\u003eNone of these things.\u003cbr\u003e\u003cbr\u003eThey had only two things in common: They knew exactly what they wanted and they felt they were moving toward getting it.\u003cbr\u003e\u003cbr\u003e\u003ci\u003eThat's\u003c\/i\u003e what makes life feel good: when it has direction, when you are headed straight for what you love.\u003cbr\u003e\u003cbr\u003eAnd I mean \u003ci\u003elove.\u003c\/i\u003e\u003cbr\u003e\u003cbr\u003eI don't mean what you're skilled at. \u003ci\u003eI don't really care what your skills are.\u003c\/i\u003e When I was a single working mother with two babies, you know what my skills were? I could clean house like a demon; catch a moving bus with my arms full of laundry, groceries, and kids; and squeeze a dollar until the picture of George Washington screamed for mercy.\u003cbr\u003e\u003cbr\u003eI do not want the career that uses those skills, thank you.\u003cbr\u003e\u003cbr\u003eI don't believe you live the good life by doing what you \u003ci\u003ecan\u003c\/i\u003e do; you live it by doing what you \u003ci\u003ewant\u003c\/i\u003e to do. I don't even think your greatest talents necessarily show up in your skills. All of us are good at things we're not madly in love with. \u003ci\u003eAnd all of us have talents we've never used.\u003c\/i\u003e\u003cbr\u003e\u003cbr\u003eRelying on your skills to guide you is simply unacceptable. That's why I don't intend to give you personality tests or skills assessments to find out what you should be doing.\u003cbr\u003e\u003cbr\u003eI \u003ci\u003eknow\u003c\/i\u003e what you should be doing.\u003cbr\u003e\u003cbr\u003eYou should be doing what you love.\u003cbr\u003e\u003cbr\u003e\u003ci\u003eWhat you love is what you are gifted at.\u003c\/i\u003e Only love will give you the drive to stick to something until you develop your gift. That's the way really big things get accomplished in this world -- by people no different than you and I who know what they want and put everything they've got behind it.\u003cbr\u003e\u003cbr\u003eIf you don't know what you want, you can't get out of the starting gate -- and that's discouraging. But you're not alone. Recent figures show that as many as 98 percent of Americans are unhappy in their jobs. And it isn't only financial considerations that keep them where they are; they simply don't know what to do instead. What you may have thought was your private little nightmare turns out to be heartbreakingly common.\u003cbr\u003e\u003cbr\u003eWell, I have a surprise for you.\u003cbr\u003e\u003cbr\u003eYou \u003ci\u003edo\u003c\/i\u003e  know what you want.\u003cbr\u003e\u003cbr\u003eEverybody does. That's why you feel so restless when you can't find the right track. You sense there's some particular work you are meant to be doing. And you're right. Einstein needed to formulate theories of physics, Harriet Tubman needed to guide people to freedom, and you need to follow \u003ci\u003eyour\u003c\/i\u003e  original vision. As Vartan Gregorian said, \"The universe is not going to see someone like you again in the entire history of creation.\" Each of us is one of a kind. Every living person has a completely original way of looking at the world, and originality \u003ci\u003ealways\u003c\/i\u003e needs to express itself.\u003cbr\u003e\u003cbr\u003eBut many of us get stopped. Every time we resolve to change our lives, every time we go to pick up the baton and get into the race, something happens. For some mysterious reason our determination melts. We look at the baton and think \"This race isn't it.\" And we put down the baton, uneasy because time is slipping away, frightened that we'll \u003ci\u003enever\u003c\/i\u003e  find \"it.\"\u003cbr\u003e\u003cbr\u003eThere are two reasons for this.\u003cbr\u003e\u003cbr\u003e\u003ci\u003eOne reason it's so hard to know what we want is that we have so many options.\u003c\/i\u003e This wasn't always true. Our parents and their parents had fewer choices and clearer goals. It's a tribute to the success of our culture that so many of us have the freedom to search for our own life's work.\u003cbr\u003e\u003cbr\u003eFreedom is glorious. But freedom also torments us because it requires us to create our own goals.\u003cbr\u003e\u003cbr\u003eDid you know that fewer people get depressed during war than in peacetime? In a war, everything is important. Day to day, you know exactly what to do. Your life may be frightening, but the struggle to survive gives you direction and drive. You don't waste any time trying to figure out what you're worth or what you're supposed to do with your life. You just try to keep alive, save your home, help your neighbors. The reason we love to watch films about people whose lives are in danger is because every move is loaded with meaning.\u003cbr\u003e\u003cbr\u003eWhen there's no emergency to rise to, we have to \u003ci\u003ecreate\u003c\/i\u003e  goals that have meaning. You can create such goals if you know what your dream is -- but this is a relatively new way of living. The old way to live was to let necessity create your goal; the new way is to use your dream to create your goal. We have had very little practice at this new way.\u003cbr\u003e\u003cbr\u003e\u003ci\u003eThe second reason you don't know what you want is that something inside you is stopping you from knowing.\u003c\/i\u003e Your dreams are obscured by some kind of internal conflict. It's not as easy as you might think to spot inner conflicts. Often they're disguised as self-reproach. \"Maybe I have no talent,\" \"Maybe I'm just lazy,\" \"If I were smarter I'd have done more with my life.\"\u003cbr\u003e\u003cbr\u003eIf there's one thing I want you to get out of reading this book it's to know that not one of those statements is true.\u003cbr\u003e\u003cbr\u003e\u003ci\u003eThe first goal of this book is to shine a spotlight on your particular inner conflict so you can see it clearly outlined.\u003c\/i\u003e As soon as you see what's been in your way, you'll know exactly why you haven't created the life you wanted. You'll quit reproaching yourself. You'll understand that you've been unable to get moving \u003ci\u003efor a reason.\u003c\/i\u003e\u003cbr\u003e\u003cbr\u003eOur culture is full of simpleminded myths of blame, such as \"If you really wanted something badly enough, you'd go out and get it,\" and \"If you're sabotaging yourself, you lack character.\" Nobody ever asks the obvious question: \"Why would anybody want to do himself harm by sabotaging himself?\" It takes curiosity to find the answer to that question, and judgmental people always lack curiosity.\u003cbr\u003e\u003cbr\u003eIn the following chapters we're going to stop all this blaming and swap it for honest, nonjudgmental curiosity. I have the deepest respect for sincere curiosity -- and very little respect for self-righteousness. The useful answers, the answers that help us solve problems, are always the more forgiving ones. \u003ci\u003eThey're based on a line of inquiry that assumes there is always a good reason for everything.\u003c\/i\u003e There is certainly a good reason you lost direction, and this book is going to help you find it.\u003cbr\u003e\u003cbr\u003eUntil then, just remember, whatever you were doing until you picked up this book, you were not being lazy or stupid or cowardly. Even self-improvement programs, no matter how helpful, are often judgmental. They are often based on the assumption that you don't have what you want because you haven't developed the right way of thinking. They assume you've got to get fixed before you can get what you want.\u003cbr\u003e\u003cbr\u003eWell, forget that.\u003cbr\u003e\u003cbr\u003eYou don't have to become a better person or develop a different attitude to have a life you love. As you are, you are good enough. In fact, the smartest thing you can do is to go ahead and get what you want \u003ci\u003ebefore\u003c\/i\u003e you do anything to improve yourself. Getting your life on track will do wonders for your \"bad\" attitude.\u003cbr\u003e\u003cbr\u003eI have no intention of suckering you into some program that tells you to stand up straight and be a different person. Life just isn't that simple, and wishful thinking won't make it so. I don't think people solve problems with positive thinking either. Propping up your thoughts, pretending to feel different than you really do, is not a sturdy enough system for the long haul.  Creative visualization has its limitations too. I've met a lot of people who can't visualize, and others who feel strongly conflicted even \u003ci\u003eimagining\u003c\/i\u003e what they love. And \"create your own reality\" \u003ci\u003esounds\u003c\/i\u003e  empowering, but its flip side is that you can end up blaming yourself for everything that goes wrong. That's not fair. You're not big enough to take on fate single-handedly, and you don't need to.\u003cbr\u003e\u003cbr\u003eWhat you \u003ci\u003edo\u003c\/i\u003e need is to understand why you don't know what you want. Once you begin to understand the perfectly good explanation for your confusion, you will finally be able to do something about it.\u003cbr\u003e\u003cbr\u003e\u003ci\u003eThe second goal of this book is to show you how to do something about it.\u003c\/i\u003e I've put tools and strategies in each chapter to help you extricate yourself from your internal conflicts every time you need to--now and in the future.\u003cbr\u003e\u003cbr\u003eThe first three chapters of this book are for \u003ci\u003eevery reader\u003c\/i\u003e. They're the chapters that shine a light on your conflict and illuminate its contours for you. Once you see the general shape of your problem, you'll be able to flip to a chapter in the book that will give you strategies for doingwhatever you've got to do to get past your particular kind of conflict.\u003cbr\u003e\u003cbr\u003eIt's not hard to learn what your inner conflict is about, because once you learn to listen for it, you'll notice inner conflicts make a lot of racket. One side of the conflict is arguing in favor of your getting what you want, and the other side is determined to stop you. All you have to do is listen carefully to the louder voice: It will lead you straight to the strategies that can help you.\u003cbr\u003e\u003cbr\u003eDoes your voice say something like \u003ci\u003e\"I'd have to quit my job to get what I really want and I can't do that -- I'd starve\"\u003c\/i\u003e? If so, you'll want to read Chapter 4, \"The Sure Thing,\" where you'll learn about the great risk you take when you avoid adventure.\u003cbr\u003e\u003cbr\u003eDoes your voice say \u003ci\u003e\"Every time I try to go after what I want, I drop the ball and I don't know why\"\u003c\/i\u003e? Then try Chapter 5, \"Fear of Success: Leaving the Ones You Love Behind.\"\u003cbr\u003e\u003cbr\u003eIf your voice says \"\u003ci\u003eI want to do so many things, I'll never be able to pick only one,\u003c\/i\u003e\"Chapter 6 will show you how to have it all. (It will also show you how to focus on just one thing, if that's what you secretly wish you could do.)\u003cbr\u003e\u003cbr\u003eNow, what if you're doing wonderfully in other people's eyes, you've got a skyrocketing career on your hands, but you're not happy? Is your voice saying \u003ci\u003e\"How can I walk away from success? And what will I live on if I do\"\u003c\/i\u003e? Take a new look at your options. Turn to Chapter 7, \"On the Wrong Track, and Moving Fast.\"\u003cbr\u003e\u003cbr\u003eWhen you think you know what you want, but your voice says \"\u003ci\u003eI want something I shouldn't want -- it's trivial or unworthy,\"\u003c\/i\u003e  that's Chapter 8. You might have a \"tribal problem\" with your family, friends, or culture: you want something that puts you in conflict with everything you were taught.\u003cbr\u003e\u003cbr\u003eIf you've just finished high school or college or a training program and your voice says \u003ci\u003e\"I'm afraid to choose something. I might get trapped!\u003c\/i\u003e\" then pick up Chapter 9, \"Help! I'm Not Ready to Be Born Yet.\" It'll show you how to avoid being trapped and start living.\u003cbr\u003e\u003cbr\u003e\u003cbr\u003eChapter 10, \"Regrouping: It's a Whole New Ball Game,\" will help if you've just been through a big change -- if you've just retired or if the kids have just grown up and left home -- in which case you probably hear a voice saying, \u003ci\u003e\"I don't have Idea One what to do now.\"\u003c\/i\u003e\u003cbr\u003e\u003cbr\u003eIf your voice says \u003ci\u003e\"What's the point? I'll only be disappointed. Nothing will ever match what I already had and lost,\"\u003c\/i\u003e turn to Chapter 11, \"I've Lost My Big Dream -- There's Nothing Left.\" You'll discover that life is still worth living.\u003cbr\u003e\u003cbr\u003e\u003cbr\u003eIf you hear your voice saying \u003ci\u003e\"I've tried so many things and  \u003c\/i\u003enothing\u003ci\u003e does it for me,\"\u003c\/i\u003e  then look at Chapter 12, \"Nothing Ever Interests Me.\" You've probably got a case of disabled desire.\u003cbr\u003e\u003cbr\u003eIf your voice says \"\u003ci\u003eIt's not  \u003c\/i\u003emy\u003ci\u003e fault I'm not doing what I want -- the world won't give me a break!\u003c\/i\u003e\" you need to look at Chapter 13, \"A Rage Against the Ordinary.\" And if you hear a voice saying \"\u003ci\u003eI'm trying to go after something, but my heart's not really in it, and I don't know why,\u003c\/i\u003e\" your situation is not as big a mystery as you may think. Look at Chapter 14, \"The Red Herring, or Trying Hard to Love Something You Don't Really Want.\" You might discover you \u003ci\u003ereally\u003c\/i\u003e want something you're trying to give up.\u003cbr\u003e\u003cbr\u003eIf you can't hear any voice from your conflict now, don't let it worry you. You'll hear it by the end of Chapter 3. I guarantee it. \u003cbr\u003e\u003cbr\u003eCAREERS IN THE NINETIES Once you begin to find your own path, you will have positioned yourself at the forefront of a massive historical change. In late twentieth-century industrial society, just about everybody -- like it or not -- is going to have to figure out what kind of work and life he really wants. Sooner or later \u003ci\u003eeverybody\u003c\/i\u003e across \u003ci\u003eevery age group\u003c\/i\u003e  is going to have to ask \"What do \u003ci\u003eI\u003c\/i\u003e want to do?\"\u003cbr\u003e\u003cbr\u003eThe days are over when students took the path of least resistance to a banking career, say, or to law school and considered that one choice the end of their career planning. Last year's college graduates, according to one research firm, can expect to hold ten to twelve jobs in three to five different fields during their working lifetime. Like it or not, everybody's getting a second work life. Probably, a third life. Perhaps even more.\u003cbr\u003e\u003cbr\u003eCorporations are continuing to downsize, and not only because of recent recessions: We're entering a new period in economic history. Global competition is forcing companies to make themselves lean and mean. Corporations are becoming about a third the size they once were, and they'll probably never get big again. Middle management is gone. Secretaries are being replaced by technology. The top twenty students from every college or business school may still get good job offers, but everyone else is on their own.\u003cbr\u003e\u003cbr\u003eThe wave of the future is clear: We're going to be a nation of experts -- consultants and entrepreneurs -- many of us working at home, all of us hired on a job-by-job basis according to our special talents.\u003cbr\u003e\u003cbr\u003eAnd who's going to come shining through these cultural changes? Everyone who is \u003cbr\u003ewilling to develop what he \u003ci\u003eloves\u003c\/i\u003e into a niche for himself -- a niche where he can excel. \u003ci\u003eNever have we needed to locate our own gifts more.\u003c\/i\u003e\u003cbr\u003e\u003cbr\u003eSo let's get going. Let's see why you don't know what you want. And then, let's \u003cbr\u003edo something about it.","brand":"Dell","offers":[{"title":"Default Title","offer_id":46305315553509,"sku":"NP9780440505006","price":19.0,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":false}],"thumbnail_url":"\/\/cdn.shopify.com\/s\/files\/1\/1842\/7735\/files\/9780440505006.jpg?v=1767729620","url":"https:\/\/k12savings.com\/products\/i-could-do-anything-if-i-only-knew-what-it-was-isbn-9780440505006","provider":"K12savings","version":"1.0","type":"link"}