{"product_id":"keeping-your-kids-out-front-without-kicking-them-from-behind-isbn-9780787952235","title":"Keeping Your Kids Out Front Without Kicking Them From Behind","description":"Keeping Your Kids Out Front Without Kicking Them From Behind is acommon sense guide for moms and dads of talented and giftedchildren. In this practical book, authors Dr. Ian Tofler andTheresa Geronimo--experts in the field of parenting--present theirSeven-Step Program for Encouraging and Protecting High-AchievingChildren. This innovative program offers guidance for establishinghealthy boundaries between parents' ambitions and the needs oftheir talented children and clear-cut instructions for helpingchildren balance achievement with happiness.\u003cbr\u003e \u003cbr\u003e To read Debating What is Best for Our Children, an excerpt fromthis book,click here. Introduction.\u003cbr\u003e \u003cbr\u003e AN UP-CLOSE LOOK AT PARENTS AND CHILDREN.\u003cbr\u003e \u003cbr\u003e Debating What is Best for Our Children.\u003cbr\u003e \u003cbr\u003e From Benign to Abusive.\u003cbr\u003e \u003cbr\u003e A SEVEN-STEP PROGRAM FOR ENCOURAGING AND PROTECTING HIGH-ACHIEVINGCHILDREN.\u003cbr\u003e \u003cbr\u003e Step 1: Define and Evaluate \"Talent\" Why Evaluate Talent?;\u003cbr\u003e Six Points of Talent Evaluation;\u003cbr\u003e Advice from the Experts.\u003cbr\u003e \u003cbr\u003e Step 2: Selecting Classes, Schools, and Camps that Cater toHigh-Achieving Children Evaluate Four Motives for Special Training:1) Improvement of Skill, 2) Supportive Environment, 3) EliteExposure, 4) Resume Building; and Advice From the Experts.\u003cbr\u003e \u003cbr\u003e Step 3: Beware Abusive Instructors Avoiding the Win-At-Any-CostInstructor;\u003cbr\u003e The Burden of Star Makers;\u003cbr\u003e Understanding The Verbal Batterer;\u003cbr\u003e The Danger of the Parent Substitute;\u003cbr\u003e Beware the Sexual Abuser;\u003cbr\u003e Advice from the Experts.\u003cbr\u003e \u003cbr\u003e Step 4: Weigh the Cost of Sacrifice Childhood Sacrifices;\u003cbr\u003e Parental Sacrifices;\u003cbr\u003e Sibling Sacrifices;\u003cbr\u003e Advice from the Experts.\u003cbr\u003e \u003cbr\u003e Step 5: Look Beyond the Talent Into the Future Look Beyond theTalent;\u003cbr\u003e Look Where You're Going;\u003cbr\u003e Beware the Downside of Competition;\u003cbr\u003e Watch Those Social Skills;\u003cbr\u003e Minimize Chronic Stress;\u003cbr\u003e Nurture Your Parent\/Child Relationship;\u003cbr\u003e Advice from the Experts.\u003cbr\u003e \u003cbr\u003e Step 6: Beware the Red Flags of Achievement by Proxy DistortionBurnout;\u003cbr\u003e Over-training;\u003cbr\u003e Depression;\u003cbr\u003e Psychological Pain and Illness;\u003cbr\u003e Eating Disorders;\u003cbr\u003e Substance Abuse;\u003cbr\u003e Answering a Cry For Help.\u003cbr\u003e \u003cbr\u003e Step 7: Take a Good Look at your Parenting Style AutocraticController;\u003cbr\u003e Narcissistic and Needy;\u003cbr\u003e Financially Hungry;\u003cbr\u003e Overly Competitive;\u003cbr\u003e Frustrated Wanna-Be or Has-Been;\u003cbr\u003e Living in Denial;\u003cbr\u003e Untangling the Roots of ABPD;\u003cbr\u003e Encourage and Support.\u003cbr\u003e \u003cbr\u003e Epilogue.\u003cbr\u003e \u003cbr\u003e Chapter Notes. \"This book provides the third voice that parents of gifted chidlrenreally need to help make the difficult everyday decisions. How muchstudy or practice is too much versus too little? How much pressureor competition is an incentive for a child's mastery, and how muchis too stressful for a young talented person?\" (Bonnie and FredWaitzkin, Bonnie Waitzkin, director of chess program for giftedelementary school children, Fred Waitzkin, author, Searching forBobby Fischer and The Last Marlin.)\u003cbr\u003e \u003cbr\u003e \"An excellent book for all parents to read! It fills a voidespecially for parents with kids in sports.\" (Joan Ryan, author,Little Girls in Pretty Boxes)\u003cbr\u003e \u003cbr\u003e \"A concise yet richly developed book on a critical topic for thiscentury, by a well-respected psychiatrist.\" (Ron Kamm, M.D., vicepresident, International Society for Sport Psychiatry and fellow ofthe American Psychiatric Association)\u003cbr\u003e \u003cbr\u003e \"Tofler and DiGeronimo's pre-eminent book develops reasonedapproaches to the development of healthy, successful, and talentedchildren, while avoiding the potentially damaging, even deadlydemands placed upon their young shoulders. . . . [they] haveprovided marvelous examples, suggestions, guidelines, andconclusions. They will show you how to define the distinctionsbetween healthy nurturing and harmful exploitation as you bringyour talented, highly talented or even genius children in a familysetting.\" (Larry Stone, M.D., past president, American Academy ofChild and Adolescent Psychiatry, Clinical Professor of Psychiatry,University of Texas Health Science Center at San Antonio) IAN TOFLER, M.B., B.S., is a Harvard-trained child and adolescent psychiatrist in practice in Los Angeles. He is the inaugural chair of the Sport Psychiatry Committee of the American Academy of Child and Adolescent Psychiatry. THERESA FOY DIGERONIMO, M.Ed., is coauthor of How to Talk to Your Children About Really Important Things and How to Talk to Teens About Really Important Things (Jossey-Bass, 1994, 1999). Do you believe your child is gifted—certainly more talented than the kid next door? Are you proactively positioning your young child for college honors, a professional career, and well-deserved fame? If so, beware! You could be unwittingly pushing your kid to fulfill your own dreams of grandeur and success. Because a typical day may be crammed with advanced academic assignments, after-school piano lessons, art classes, and soccer tournaments, many of these talented children are careening off the fast track to success. Under so much pressure and stress, they are crashing and burning before they reach adolescence. How can you, as a parent of a truly gifted child, walk the fine line between supporting your talented kid and projecting your own needs and desires? Written with wisdom and a healthy dose of wit, this practical guide shows how to avoid the negative effects of \"Achievement by Proxy Distortion\" (ABPD) and protect kids from being overscheduled, overworked and overpressured. Filled with a wealth of interviews and insight from noted experts in the field of child development, this enlightening book includes directions for evaluating a child's abilities, suggestions for monitoring a child's mental and physical health, and information for understanding the financial and emotional commitment needed to support the development of a child's talent. Most important, the authors present guidelines that will help parents separate their own needs, ambitions, and dreams from those of their children. Using the author's Seven-Step Program for Encouraging and Protecting High-Achieving Children, parents can? Establish if a child is truly exceptional? Select classes, schools, and camps that nurture high-achievers? Learn to deal with over-the-edge instructors? Weigh the cost of sacrifices made in the pursuit of excellence? Watch for red flags of ABPD behaviorExceptional children need exceptionally balanced guidance. The suggestions outlined in this book   Do you believe your child is gifted—certainly more talented than the kid next door? Are you proactively positioning your young child for college honors, a professional career, and well-deserved fame? If so, beware! You could be unwittingly pushing your kid to fulfill your own dreams of grandeur and success. Because a typical day may be crammed with advanced academic assignments, after-school piano lessons, art classes, and soccer tournaments, many of these talented children are careening off the fast track to success. Under so much pressure and stress, they are crashing and burning before they reach adolescence.  \u003cp\u003eHow can you, as a parent of a truly gifted child, walk the fine line between supporting your talented kid and projecting your own needs and desires?\u003c\/p\u003e \u003cp\u003eWritten with wisdom and a healthy dose of wit, this practical guide shows how to avoid the negative effects of \"Achievement by Proxy Distortion\" (ABPD) and protect kids from being overscheduled, overworked and overpressured. Filled with a wealth of interviews and insight from noted experts in the field of child development, this enlightening book includes directions for evaluating a child's abilities, suggestions for monitoring a child's mental and physical health, and information for understanding the financial and emotional commitment needed to support the development of a child's talent. Most important, the authors present guidelines that will help parents separate their own needs, ambitions, and dreams from those of their children.\u003c\/p\u003e \u003cp\u003eUsing the author's Seven-Step Program for Encouraging and Protecting High-Achieving Children, parents can\u003cbr\u003e \u003c\/p\u003e \u003cul\u003e \u003cli\u003eEstablish if a child is truly exceptional\u003cbr\u003e \u003c\/li\u003e \u003cli\u003eSelect classes, schools, and camps that nurture high-achievers\u003cbr\u003e \u003c\/li\u003e \u003cli\u003eLearn to deal with over-the-edge instructors\u003cbr\u003e \u003c\/li\u003e \u003cli\u003eWeigh the cost of sacrifices made in the pursuit of excellence\u003cbr\u003e \u003c\/li\u003e \u003cli\u003eWatch for red flags of ABPD behavior\u003c\/li\u003e \u003c\/ul\u003e \u003cp\u003eExceptional children need exceptionally balanced guidance. The suggestions outlined in this book will help parents learn how to nurture their talented children and support them as they strive to reach their full potential.\u003c\/p\u003e \u003cp\u003e\u003cbr\u003e Give Your Exceptional Child Exceptional Support\u003c\/p\u003e \u003cp\u003eAre you pushing your kid to the breaking point? Don't fall into the trap of pressuring your gifted child into achieving your own unfulfilled longings for glory and success. Living up to those dreams has its price. Your kids could be cheated out of a normal childhood as you enroll them in an endless series of classes and lessons in your quest to see your offspring reach the top.\u003c\/p\u003e \u003cp\u003eKeeping Your Kids Out Front Without Kicking Them From Behind is a commonsense guide for moms and dads of talented and gifted children. In this practical book, Dr. Ian Tofler and Theresa Foy DiGeronimo—experts in the field of parentin—present their Seven-Step Program for Encouraging and Protecting High-Achieving Children. This innovative program offers guidance for establishing healthy boundaries between parents' ambitions and the needs of their talented children, and clear-cut instructions for helping children balance achievement with happiness.\u003c\/p\u003e \u003cp\u003e\"This book provides the third voice that parents of gifted chidlren really need to help make the difficult everyday decisions. How much study or practice is too much versus too little? How much pressure or competition is an incentive for a child's mastery, and how much is too stressful for a young talented person?\"\u003cbr\u003e —Beth Samberg, program director, ACE Educational Services, SAT preparation course, Los Angeles, California\u003c\/p\u003e \u003cp\u003e\"An excellent book for all parents to read! It fills a void especially for parents with kids in sports.\"\u003cbr\u003e —Joan Ryan, author, Little Girls in Pretty Boxes\u003c\/p\u003e \u003cp\u003e\"A concise yet richly developed book on a critical topic for this century, by a well-respected psychiatrist.\"\u003cbr\u003e —Ron Kamm, M.D., vice president, International Society for Sport Psychiatry and fellow of the American Psychiatric Association\u003c\/p\u003e \u003cp\u003e\u003cbr\u003e \u003c\/p\u003e","brand":"Jossey-Bass","offers":[{"title":"Default Title","offer_id":47989496447205,"sku":"NP9780787952235","price":32.0,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":false}],"thumbnail_url":"\/\/cdn.shopify.com\/s\/files\/1\/1842\/7735\/files\/9780787952235.jpg?v=1761784337","url":"https:\/\/k12savings.com\/es\/products\/keeping-your-kids-out-front-without-kicking-them-from-behind-isbn-9780787952235","provider":"K12savings","version":"1.0","type":"link"}