No Fats, No Fems: A Guide to Queer Empathy and Unpacking Prejudice

The essential modern guide for understanding what divides us and the path to building a better community—a revolutionary call to arms for embracing kindness and empathy, from queer advocate and sex educator Max Hovey.

Exclusionary and derogatory rhetoric in online spaces like “no fats, no fems” is often an unfortunate reality for many queer people and speaks to a larger issue at hand—but it doesn’t have to be this way.

Max Hovey has gained thousands of supporters worldwide in his efforts to challenge stereotypes and unpack the problematic ideologies queer people can place on each other—and often on themselves. Combining diverse personal testimonies and the latest research from across the LGBTQIA+ community, his groundbreaking guide explores:

• prejudice in queer spaces through discussions of race, class, and identity
• the historical evolution of queer thought
• the role of intersectionality in the fight for LGBTQIA+ rights
• internalized homophobia and its role in creating division
• body image issues and the importance of sexual liberation
• how to accept non-conformity and handle rejection
• self-reflection through understanding different perspectives
• ways to promote positivity and acceptance in ourselves and others
• what having pride and community really means

Regardless of background or sexual orientation, our mutual goal is empathy, and Max gives us all the tools needed to get there. The Velvet Rage for a modern audience, No Fats, No Fems is an urgent call to action, offering a roadmap to building stronger community and a much kinder future.

"No Fats, No Fems is an inward look at who we are as LGBTQIA+ humans. Max Hovey breaks down walls and shows us how we can build stronger relationships, self-discovery, and understanding of how to collaboratively communicate as a community. It’s a way to educate yourself so that we can create a better future together. I highly recommend this book." - Kennedy Ann Scott, drag queen, activist, educator, and co-author of No Tea, No Shade