This Was Never the Plan

Vaneetha takes on a sensitive, deeply personal, potentially embarrassing reality with clarity and honesty yet without rancor or malice. As someone who has been through a divorce in similar circumstances to hers, I can attest to the painful yet healing accuracy of her wisdom in these pages. And I can attest to the unfailing hope she points the reader to in Christ, without flippancy or pat answers. Prior to this book, I knew of no books on divorce I would actually be willing to hand to a person navigating that devastating reality. Now I have one, and I am grateful for it! | No one begins a marriage saying, ‘I sure hope I’ll get to walk through a divorce,’ and yet so many of us end up facing the realities of shattered dreams and broken promises. Once again, my friend Vaneetha Risner has parlayed her suffering into deep understanding, scriptural fidelity, and gracious blessing. I strongly recommend this resource, for those who are facing divorce and also for those who are seeking to help. | Our God hates divorce. So do his people. We grieve the sin and profound hurt that lead to and come from divorces. As Jesus says, it was not this way from the beginning. Yet mourn them as we do, they happen, and so tragically often in our day, and many of Christ’s people are left aching and searching for Christian counsel in their devastation. Vaneetha has not only walked with faith through this devastation but has been courageous enough to answer the call to help other Christians who are hurting. This book is no celebration of divorce but an offer of real, solid Christian hope in the midst of one of life’s greatest anguishes. I pray this book will help you move forward in Jesus and draw closer to him in your pain.” | I wish I had had this book when I was first facing divorce. Vaneetha offers essential wisdom for anyone facing divorce, and her words are helpful for those of us on the other side of it as well. God is kind, and his words are trustworthy. Vaneetha reminds us, in a voice we can hear, of the value of trusting Jesus despite circumstances that seem to knock us off our foundation. I pray this book is shared far and wide. | In a season that is painfully lonely and isolating, Vaneetha’s words made me feel seen and even encouraged. With honesty and tenderness, she gave language to the layered ache, confusion, and grief of divorce—especially for a Christian—while offering practical handlebars for traveling through it with faith. This book helped me feel less alone in my pain, and I’ll be sharing it with friends who need the reminder that, even in the devastation of divorce, God will never leave us. | As someone who has personally walked through the devastation of divorce, I know the crushing weight of betrayal, the loneliness of an empty home, and the ache of wondering if life will ever feel whole again. For those of us who have endured this pain, resources often fall short—either too abstract and theological to touch the heart or too shallow to offer lasting hope. That is why This Was Never the Plan is such a rare and necessary gift. It is tender, timely, and profoundly hopeful. Vaneetha writes not as a detached expert but as a fellow sojourner. This is a trustworthy companion for anyone navigating the heartbreak of divorce. | “Biblically rich, wonderfully practical, and searingly honest, this is a book we so badly need. Through the measured use of her own experience, Vaneetha Risner provides a first-hand account of the struggles Christians face when their lives are upended by divorce. Where this book really excels, however, is in its description of the many ways Christ meets us in such struggles. This isn’t just a book for those who have experienced divorce; it needs to be read by their friends and by the pastors of their churches. | If you’re holding this book, your heart is wrenching. Vaneetha is a tender guide in this tumultuous time. This Was Never the Plan comes alongside you as you grapple with the hard questions and social challenges of processing an unwanted divorce. Allow this book to serve you one page at a time as you walk with God one day at a time. | I am so thankful for this book. Vaneetha offers comfort and hope as she lays open the Scriptures and her own heart. There are no well-worn platitudes or shallow promises but plenty of compassion, wisdom, and grace—and just the right amount of humour. Vaneetha’s experience enables her to speak tenderly, and she also offers practical guidance for those navigating the challenges of single parenting, dating, and belonging at church. This will be of enormous help both to those experiencing divorce and those seeking walk to alongside. | If you are reeling from a divorce you never wanted, This Was Never the Plan is a lifeline. In these pages, you will see yourself in Vaneetha’s story as she opens her heart and shares the raw, unfiltered emotions of her own unwanted divorce. But Vaneetha doesn’t leave you in the pain. With honesty and compassion, she gently guides you along a pathway of healing—helping you move through the heartbreak you feel today toward renewed hope for tomorrow. Her journey is living proof that your heart can heal, your future can be restored, and that divorce doesn’t get the last word. | This book is deeply moving and profoundly courageous yet genuinely hope-filled. Vaneetha Rendall Risner’s journey through the anguish of divorce is painful but vital reading for anyone who has had to trace a similar path, as well as for those walking beside them. You are not alone. | Compassionate, wise, and vulnerably honest, Vaneetha offers women facing divorce both a roadmap for healing and a blueprint for rebuilding. She shows readers not just how to mend a broken heart but how to emerge stronger and healthier—not in spite of their pain but because of it. | With appropriate honesty and God-given grace, Vaneetha Risner shares the heartbreak of divorce and the deeper hope that can be found in Christ. This Was Never the Plan offers comfort that will help the wounded and truth that will inform the perplexed. Through it, she guides hurting believers to believe in God’s purpose and rest in his love. | Vaneetha Rendall Risner is passionate about helping others find hope and joy in the midst of suffering. Her story includes contracting polio as a child, losing an infant son unexpectedly, developing post-polio syndrome and going through an unwanted divorce, all of which have forced her to deal with issues of loss. She and her husband, Joel, live in Raleigh, North Carolina, and have four daughters between them. Vaneetha holds degrees from the University of Virginia and Stanford and is the author of several books, including This Was Never the Plan, Watching for the Morning and her memoir, Walking Through Fire. She is a regular contributor to Desiring God. She blogs at her website, vaneetha.com, and is obsessed with colorfulcolorful office supplies and dark chocolate.