The Parental Leave Playbook

Support your growing family without losing professional ground—a proven approach

The Parental Leave Playbook helps parents take control of their leave and make the most of what's considered a career timeout, but is actually a vital "time-in" for your life. If you're an expecting or new parent concerned about how your leave and return plans will affect your visibility, candidacy for promotion, work relationships, and performance (not to mention your identity and home life), this book will guide you into the smoothest transition possible. Most importantly, this book will help you as you grow and strengthen yourself and your family while remaining a professional.

In The Parental Leave Playbook, you'll learn Dr. Amy Beacom's innovative R.E.T.A.I.N. framework and the three-phase, ten-touchpoint model, to coach yourself through the leave process. Beacom identifies the critical points before, during, and after leave where parents and managers must work together, and explains how parents can facilitate success by finessing the way they approach their manager and colleagues. These models are supported by case studies from the author's work in the field with leading organizations like Microsoft, and supplemented by resources such as the evidence-based Parental Leave Transition Assessment (PLTA) sample report, leave action plan templates, reflection prompts, and development exercises to enhance self-awareness and skills.

You'll learn how to:

• Communicate your parental leave plans effectively and at the right time
• Set expectations with managers and colleagues to ensure a smooth transition
• Learn how to maintain visibility, avoid being replaced, and continue your upward career trajectory during your parental leave and beyond
• Grow and strengthen your family without sacrificing your professional gains

All working parents-to-be can benefit from the ideas and proven tools in this direct and practical book.

Author’s Note ix

Introduction xiii

Chapter 1 Parental Leave Is a Mess— Let’s Fix It! 1

Chapter 2 The 10A Transition Touchpoints Framework 13

Phase One Preparing for Leave: Work Focus 31

Chapter 3 Phase 1: Preparing for Leave Overview 33

Chapter 4 Touchpoint 1: Announcement 39

Chapter 5 Touchpoint 2: Assess 51

Chapter 6 Touchpoint 3: Action Plan 67

Chapter 7 Touchpoint 4: Acknowledge the Transition to Parenthood 97

Phase Two During Leave: Parent Focus 109

Chapter 8 Phase 2: During Leave Overview 111

Chapter 9 Touchpoint 5: Appropriately Keep in Touch 115

Chapter 10 Touchpoint 6: Advocate 125

Chapter 11 Touchpoint 7: Arrangements for Return 143

Phase Three Returning from Leave: Working Parent Focus 155

Chapter 12 Phase 3: Returning from Leave Overview 157

Chapter 13 Touchpoint 8: Acknowledge the Transition to Working Parent 163

Chapter 14 Touchpoint 9: Adjustment 171

Chapter 15 Touchpoint 10: Access to Career Development 189

Rounding Out the Human Experience 205

Chapter 16 Additional Challenges and Resources 207

Appendix 1: Values Exercise List 219

Appendix 2: Free Resources from the Center for Parental Leave Leadership 221

Appendix 3: An Emerging Working Parent Support Ecosystem 223

Appendix 4: Recommended Reading 233

Endnotes and General References 237

Acknowledgments 253

About the Authors 257

Index 259

AMY BEACOM, EdD, is founder and CEO of the Center for Parental Leave Leadership, the first consultancy in the U.S. to focus exclusively on parental leave. Drawing on over 25 years in executive leadership development and coaching, Amy consults with Fortune 100 companies, international organizations, working parents, and more to transform the way our companies and our country engage with the parental leave transition.

SUE CAMPBELL is a writer, author, and coach who has worked with the Center for Parental Leave Leadership since its early days, helping to communicate the transformative impact of their core mission. Her writing, often focused on issues important to parents, has been published in many outlets, including Prevention, Good Housekeeping, Scary Mommy, and Mamalode.

Few issues are as fraught for working parents as how to take parental leave. While many seek to take time off from work to bond with their new child, concerns about work and finances sometimes prevent full enjoyment and utilization of this timeframe.

In The Parental Leave Playbook, author and consultant Dr. Amy Beacom and co-author Sue Campbell deliver an insightful treatment of how parents can take a leadership role when they take parental leave. The authors explain how to deal with the worries that many expectant parents have—becoming invisible at work, losing opportunities for promotion, seeing relationships deteriorate, and having difficulties juggling work and home roles.

Readers of this book will learn how to set healthy and realistic expectations for their leave, transition smoothly to and from their leave period, maintain visibility at work, build better relationships, and nurture their career, all while strengthening their family.

Using her proprietary RETAIN framework (the first evidence-based parental leave coaching program) and a three-phase, ten-touchpoint model, Dr. Beacom coaches readers through the entire leave process, emphasizing the critical points in the transition and when and how parents and managers must work together.

Throughout the book, case studies and real-world examples illustrate and highlight the concepts contained in the book’s framework and show how they’re implemented in companies like Microsoft. Finally, the book is supplemented by robust leave support resources, including a Parental Leave Transition Assessment tool and a leave action plan template.

Perfect for soon-to-be parents or those wondering how having a child will impact their careers and lives, The Parental Leave Playbook will also earn a place in the libraries of employers, managers, executives, and founders who wish to improve their company’s parental leave program and ensure that those who take leave are properly supported.

PRAISE FOR

THE PARENTAL LEAVE PLAYBOOK

“If you’ve ever wondered how becoming a parent advances your leadership skills, read this book. If you’re currently a leader seeking to help parents who work for you improve their leadership skills by taking parental leave, read this book. It provides a clear roadmap, practical tips, real examples, and shows us that parental leave is an important leadership development experience from which everyone benefits.”
—David Dotlich, PhD, entrepreneur and author, Why CEOs Fail; Head, Heart and Guts; Leadership Passages, and ten other bestselling leadership books, President and Senior Partner, Korn Ferry International

“The Parental Leave Playbook is a must-read for any expectant parent trying to navigate the transition to working-parenthood with less stress and more joy.”
—KJ Dell’Antonia, former editor of Motherlode, current contributor to The New York Times, author of How to Be a Happier Parent

“If you feel overwhelmed about how to plan your parental leave, look no further than this compassionate and ground-breaking book. The touchpoints, commonsense, and humor help you focus your time and energy where it will do the most good to create a smooth transition.”
—Meghan Leahy, certified parent coach, author of Parenting Outside the Lines, columnist for The Washington Post

“The Parental Leave Playbook offers practical and emotional preparation that has the power to help working families at a time when they need it most. This is the perfect guidebook for expecting and new parents, and gives essential information managers need as well. No matter how long your leave and no matter what kind of company or organization you work with, this book will be your trusted guide.”
—Wendy Davis, PhD, PMH-C, executive director, Postpartum Support International