Boldly Belong

Reject the common beliefs around disability to cultivate self-acceptance, regain control, and navigate the path to genuine belonging.

In Boldly Belong: The Power of Prioritizing You in a Disabling Society, dedicated disability inclusion advocate and process improvement specialist Julie Harris delivers an actionable guide for those navigating life with disabilities. It is a practical roadmap to belonging that challenges the unjust societal shame and stigmas that shape our beliefs of disability and ourselves. The book includes reflective exercises and practical strategies to incorporate the mindset of acceptance into everyday life. The author accepts the idea of limitations caused by disability as a neutral fact, rather than as a negative or positive, and shows us how to use limitations as parameters to accept and work within, rather than resist or reframe.

In the book, you'll learn why self-acceptance, rather than trying to fit in or unrealistic, positive reframing, is the key to belonging. You'll also discover:

• How accepting your limitations, needs, and true self can lead to profound growth and possibility
• New insights that help you to question and deconstruct the harmful beliefs you've always been told to be true about you and your disability
• How to identify who you are and finally believe that you are enough
• Strategies for self-advocacy that effectively further your interests in a wide variety of settings and circumstances

Perfect for people from all over the world who have a body or brain that works differently, Boldly Belong is also an essential read for business, academic, military, and athletic leaders who want to understand more about disability and cultivate disability inclusive environments that promote belonging.

Introduction 1

Part I Stigmas Lie 11

Chapter 1 Live Life on Your Terms 13

Chapter 2 How Belief Systems Shape Identity 21

Chapter 3 Identify Who You Are Free of Stigma 29

Part II Deconstruct Faulty Belief Systems 35

Chapter 4 Disability Stigma 37

Chapter 5 Impact of Stigmas on Self 49

Chapter 6 Shame 59

Chapter 7 People-Pleasing 75

Chapter 8 Perfectionism 85

Chapter 9 Learned Helplessness 93

Chapter 10 Hyper-Independence 101

Chapter 11 Fear of Being Perceived 109

Chapter 12 Strategies to Question and Reframe 117

Part III Self-acceptance and Self-confidence 131

Chapter 13 Nervous System Regulation 133

Chapter 14 Know Yourself 147

Chapter 15 Accept Yourself 167

Chapter 16 Accept Others 177

Chapter 17 Practice Being You 183

Part IV Self-Advocacy 191

Chapter 18 Advocate for Yourself 193

Chapter 19 Tune Out Others’ Judgments 205

Chapter 20 Inevitable Resistance 213

Chapter 21 Stay True to Yourself in the Workplace 231

Chapter 22 Stay True to Yourself Even When Everything Sucks 237

References 243

Acknowledgments 251

About the Author 253

Index 255

JULIE HARRIS is a disability inclusion advocate and process improvement specialist with a focus on reasonable accommodations in the workplace. Leveraging her knowledge and experience, she has partnered with numerous employers to take their accommodation process from barely legally compliant, to actually effective and inclusive.

People with disabilities often face societal pressure to conform to the comfort of others, leading to a sense of inadequacy or a feeling that they need to hide aspects of their identity, yet most acceptance books talk about viewing the disability and its traits as a positive. The fact is, limitations do exist. Accepting them as a neutral fact rather than a negative allows us to use limitations as parameters rather than something to ignore or reframe as positive.

Boldly Belong: The Power of Being You In a Disabling Society serves as a guide for individuals with disabilities by taking them on a transformative journey that challenges deeply ingrained stigmas and belief systems and provides actionable guidance on self-advocacy to incorporate the mindset of acceptance into everyday life. By guiding readers to embrace self-acceptance, the book helps alleviate the pain of internalized stigma and empowers individuals to recognize their inherent worth and value—limitations and all.

Experienced disability inclusion advocate Julie Harris delves into topics including “fitting in” as a short-term solution and “belonging” as a long-term solution, developing a strong sense of self and strength to ease the rejection that disabled individuals unfortunately often experience, recognizing, understanding, and reshaping your self-perception of who you are as a person, and shifting your mindset from an external to internal locus of control, where you give yourself the permission and agency to have greater control over outcomes in your life.

Filled with practical tips and strategies as well as often cathartic examples to learn from, Boldly Belong: The Power of Being You In a Disabling Society is an essential read for all individuals seeking to navigate true disability acceptance in themselves, along with leaders who want to understand more about disability and cultivate disability inclusive environments.

PRAISE FOR BOLDLY BELONG

“A really important book—restoring disabled people’s self image and celebrating the power of individuality.”
—DANIEL AHERNE, Founder of Adjust and author of The Pocket Guide to Neurodiversity

“Julie’s thoughtful voice guides readers through the process of dismantling stigmas and shame in their lives. This is a topic that the disability community needs, and Julie’s someone I deeply trust to show the way. I hope all disabled people can learn how to boldly belong and be authentically themselves.”
—CATARINA RIVERA, MSEd, MPH, CPACC, Public Speaker, DEIA Consultant, and Content Creator @BlindishLatina

“Julie masterfully breaks down complex topics and provides actionable strategies for deconstructing harmful belief systems that are unfortunately still held by many. Her insights into how self-stigma and external judgments affect identity, decision-making, and overall well-being are both profound and empowering. While the book encourages readers to prioritize their own values, goals, and needs, it also seems to offer a clear path to overcoming internalized ableism and societal expectations. Boldly Belong isn’t just a book, it’s a call to embrace who you are unapologetically and to find true belonging by being your most authentic self. It caused me to pause and realize who I am outside of being the CEO of Disclo—something I don’t think I’ve had the chance to do since getting on the entrepreneurial roller coaster six years ago.”
—HANNAH OLSON, CEO of Disclo and a Forbes 30 under 30